Thursday Never List

As y’all know from yesterday, my mom is coming for a visit and I am in full panic mode. And by that I mean I am obviously sitting at my laptop wasting precious time.

If you wait until the last minute, it only takes a minute, right? RIGHT??

It doesn’t matter how often I tell myself, “Aggie, why not do this, or that, and get it out of the way before X comes over?” Usually when I do ask myself that, my other self retorts with, “HELLO?? Drama isn’t going to read itself, you know!” It’s a vicious cycle. At least it’s not viscous. That’s a whole other level my other other self would love to dissect.

I love my selfs. Heh!

Anyway, when it comes to cleaning, there are some things one should never skip. I mean it. Some things you can’t just ignore. It’s like giving Godzilla a key to Tokyo and a coupon for all-you-can-eat. Maybe that doesn’t make sense to y’all, but it sounded pretty awesome in my head.

Cleaning Jobs One Should Never Skip

#5– Refrigerator bins

Ignore it, and next thing you know the tomatoes are conspiring with the lemons to kill the lettuce and take over the fridge.

#4– Garbage disposer

Disposal… disposer… poh-tay-toh… poh-tah-toh. No matter what you call it, that little contraption hides all sorts of gunk and can really stink up the house.

#3– Towels

Any towel used for the express purpose of drying, be it a body or a dish, will start to smell of stagnant pond water.

#2– Stove pans

You know how you start cooking and suddenly the delish dish smells of dead rodent? Yeah, that’s why.

#1- Commode

Y’all should know this would be #1. If you didn’t then you have issues, and should call Molly Maid™ ASAP.

And those are my tips for today. Remember, the floor can be crunchy or sticky, as long as A) it’s not from bones or blood, 2) people wear shoes, and iii) Legos are safely stored away.

Those suckers can pierce leather 😉

Mamma Mia

My mom is coming for a visit this weekend. And y’all know what that means.

WHERE ARE THOSE FOREST CREATURES WHEN I NEED THEM???

(I started writing this this morning and then a friend came by for a visit, so I took time to bend her ear as far back as Canada. We now resume the post. Don’t complain about your free entertainment.)

Anyway, I have made a list of the stuff I wish to accomplish before she gets here. Keep in mind this list does not include mundane chores like scrubbing bathrooms or cleaning out the fridge.

• Paint small chest of drawers in silver.
• Reorganize the Christmas decorations.
• Clean out the bathroom cabinets.
• Finish hanging my artwork, so-called.
• Put away “excess” wine glasses. Notice the quotation marks.
• Get car registered.
• Hide all my Legos.

She’s actually very cool about my housekeeping, so-called. Which is nice, because if she wants to clean or fix something, she just does it while cooking. Did I mention cooking? Yes…yes, I did. And you know what’s great about it? The fact that I can gorge on her fabulous cooking and not care because she is coming waaaaaay before Lent. I’m so lucky I have sweat pants and loose shirts.

That’s how I measure happiness 😀

That Last Nerve

I try to be easy going and patient. Some people say I am the most patient person they know. That doesn’t mean I’m a saint. That just means I drive other people insane in a more subtle manner. It’s a gift, not a curse. Anyway, there are some things out there in the intertubewebnets that do try my patience, sometimes to the point where I am screaming to myself.

The fox doesn’t say any of those things.

Quit hoping to find Prince Charming. Start hoping you find those animals that really like housekeeping.

Yes, everything happens for a reason. Just remember that sometimes the reason is stupidity.

The five second rule for food is a myth. Especially if you have a two second dog.

Always try to be Harry Potter awesome, not Twilight awesome.

And with that, I hope y’all have a great Monday. As for me, I’m off to go clean house.

Apparently the forest creatures are either on strike or on vacation 😀

Random Musings for Sunday

Today is the Twelfth Day of Christmas, and still no drummers drumming. Thank goodness, because I am taking down all the Christmas stuff today. Usually I wait until Epiphany to do so, but I have stuff going on tomorrow. Nothing like taking down lights while a cold front moves through to get you motivated to do it quickly.

I made some hot chocolate the other night with Ghirardelli, milk, and cream. I topped it off with one of these:

That’s right: Candy Cane Marshmallow Peeps, dipped in chocolate. DIVINE!!!

I hate the new “Related Pin” crap at Pinterest. Who the heck would think I would be interested in pickled Northern Pike?? I do like the blood orange margarita, though.

There is no end to laundry, ever.

I am a very patient person, except when waiting on packages from Amazon to arrive. Then I am stalking the mail carrier like a boss.

I made the mistake of wearing a red shirt when I went to Target©. That wasn’t as bad as being able to answer everybody’s questions, though.

And with that, hope y’all have a wonderful Sunday 😀

Thursday Never List

Today got away from me, mostly because Hubby was travelling back from being out of town and I had to knuckle down and do some cleaning before the kids are out for the Christmas holiday. If I don’t do it now, it will never get done, and then all I will hear is complaining from the peanut gallery about it.

Been there, done that.

Things One Should Never Put Off

#5– Root touch-ups

Seeing one inch dark roots on a blond head of hair is disconcerting, like they ran out of gas or something.

#4– Writing ‘Thank You’ cards

You’ll thank me for that.

#3– The ‘check engine’ light

Every minute you put it off is worth about $50 in damage, and $200 in labor.

#2- Cleaning out the fridge

At least once a week, unless you are lonely and want to have conversations with evolving life forms. Your mileage may vary.

#1– Family

No need to explain this one at all.

Anyway, I hope y’all have a great day afternoon evening. I’m on my way to serve myself a glass of wine. I’ve been putting that off for hours!! 😀

Ever Had a Day That Started Off in the Middle of the Night and Looks to End Sometime Tomorrow?

Looks like today is THAT day.

I have been up for seven hours and have accomplished absolutely nothing.

And I just remembered I have to make a few dozen Christmas cards.

And start the Thanksgiving menu.

And figure out how to fit 20 people in the house.

And oh yes, CLEAN HOUSE.

I’m going to go lay down now.

Where Did the Week Go??

Oh, right.

Today finds me doing all the mundane stuff I put off while my friend was visiting. Sure, I put it off using the excuse of the visit. Who wouldn’t?? Exactly! Anyway, laundry can no longer be hidden must be done. But I figure I have time for a random drive-by post full of delicious nothingness.

Next to beer braised beef, that is my speciality.

I think my favorite kitchen utensil is my Santoku knife.

There are four different flavors of fudge in the refrigerator right now. There will be three by this evening, I’m sure.

There is nothing so comforting as eating a bowl of hearty soup while a cold front moves in.

Never clean up fallen acorns. It’s deer crack, and you get to enjoy fattening up venison while they clean it up and fertilize your lawn. Total win.

It is unethical to raid your kid’s Halloween candy stash. It is far more acceptable to beg and plead for candy and embarrass them in front of their friends.

Never pass up the opportunity to buy something for yourself. It doesn’t matter if it’s a dress or a saucepan.

And more importantly, never pass up the opportunity to be kind. The rewards are beyond rubies.

Anyway, time for me to get moving. I have spent enough time trolling for makeup and jewelry reading online. Y’all have a great day!! 😀

Off to a Great Start

As some of y’all know, I have been sick this past week. I had the ‘flu and didn’t know it.

Thus proving moms are superhuman.

Anyway, this morning I went to put up last nights dishes, and found the lid to my vintage Pyrex© dish was broken in shards. Son had forgotten to gather and take out the trash. Dogs decided to run outside in the mud because the grass is too wet with dew or something. And then Lenny just had to rush back out the front door, because hey, the garbage collectors were taking OUR TRASH. No, she ran in the mud, not the street. And I just remembered the day-old laundry in the washer.

And yet it’s still a great day. Why? Because *I* could have been broken, or trashed, or muddied, or stinky. And it’s always a good day when you realize that you are none of those things, and that those things are small and don’t control your life in any way.

Remember the blessings, and ignore the crap. Unless you happened to step on it while chasing psycho dogs. Then just wipe it off and move on 😉

Doom and Gloom

It’s Sunday, and it is a gloomy day out here. It rained all night, and still getting some nice, peaceful rain which is always badly needed around these parts.

Makes me glad I was lazy and decided not to wash the car yesterday.

But in a way I’m not happy about the rain, because it forces my hand into doing the laundry.

And making lunch, instead of going out for fast food.

And did I mention laundry?

Sigh…..

Hope y’all have a lazy Sunday for me 😉

Time for Motivation

Good Lawd. These past few days I have just lacked the will to finish random stuff around here.

I dusted everything, but the entertainment center.

I cleaned everything in the bathroom, but the shower stall.

I swept every floor, but the hallway to the garage.

I have several projects that are literally one step from being finished: a pumpkin needs a stem, a centerpiece needs a few leaves, apothecary lids need painting, books need mounting in frames, and so on. I know what needs to be done. I just don’t feel the want to finish it. I suppose this is a lethargy brought on by the emotional roller coaster ride in which we find ourselves for now. I know it will pass eventually, but it’s hard to not let it affect me every day, even in small ways.

So I’m going to get that fourth cup of coffee and finish five things today.

Don’t judge. Without that coffee I would be serving 25 to life somewhere. Probably 😉