Cut to the Quick

Yesterday afternoon, my friend Jennie told me of a scrapbooking class she will be teaching. Five minutes later, after a round of SQUEEEE!!!– I confirmed my spot to take her class. Five minutes after that, I was taking inventory of everything I would need for it.

This is where I noticed some of my stuff was *ahem* out of commission.

Apparently, one of my kids needed to use some of my paints and tools for a project. Normally that would be fine, since I am of the opinion that things are there to be used. But it hurt to see the sorry state of my scissors. My beautiful, magnetized, do-everything scissors, which someone thought meant “do-everything-including-use-as-pliers”. I am not at a loss for scissors, not by a long shot. But these are special!! They cut through chipboard and wire and short of doing dishes, they make me happy. Now I have to make do with regular, run-of-the-mill scissors, and that’s going to take a bit of adjusting to do.

But enough wailing about that. Some of y’all may remember this.

Well, I finally found some paper mache pumpkins!!

So today, I am working on altering these for the Great Pumpkin Mantlescape of 2012™, without my scissors. But no matter. I can do just fine with a knife and a ballpoint pen.

Trust me. I’m a professional 😉

In Vino Logica

Today I am finally going to a local winery for a tasting tour. I have been wanting to go for about…. Hm…. I want to say six months or so. Why? Because apparently I can only buy a certain wine at that particular winery and I need it like burning.

Let me attempt to explain the logic here. I like sangria. My father’s cousin used to make the best sangria ever, but she passed away before I was old enough to ask for the recipe. Don’t judge me. Anyway, I have tried sangria everywhere it was offered, hoping to find one that was close enough to her recipe, usually to no avail. Once while in Berlin we saw an offering at a biergarten. That alone should have tipped us off, but we went ahead and tried it. It looked like someone had *ahem* upchucked their fruit salad, and tasted just as vile. After that, I tried the bottled sangrias, but usually they are not sweet enough, and the citric acid tends to conflict with the alcohol somewhat.

Bunch of liars…

Fast forward to May 2012. The ladies of our local wine club make plans to go to the Wein and Sangerfest just north of here, and ZOMG!!! I find the best cheap sangria recipe EVAH!!

Texas Style Sangria

• 1 6oz can of frozen orange juice concentrate, plus one can of water
• 1 6oz can of frozen limeade concentrate, plus one can of water
• 1 liter of grapefruit soda
• 1 bottle Dry Comal Creek Foot Pressed Red Wine™

Blend limeade and orange juice concentrates with water. Add the wine, stirring well, then add the grapefruit soda, and stir well again. Freeze until slushy, or serve over ice if you are impatient, like me. Garnish with orange slices, or pass on the fruit if your impatient, like me. Those of you that are sharp-eyed will recognize where I originally posted this recipe.

Anyway, see that last item?? THAT wine is ONLY sold at the winery. Why?? Why can’t they offer it locally in all other stores that carry their brand?? It is a nice table wine, and a less expensive alternative to their Black White Spanish, which is also awesome, by the way. My point is, if you want people to buy your wine and entice them with an awesome cheap recipe, you should make said wine available to the masses. But no…. Now I have to make the sacrifice of an afternoon, and go to a tasting room just so that I can purchase a bottle or five of wine.

It’s a sacrifice I’m willing to make 😉

The Big Reveal!!

FINALLY!!!!

Ok, so I am still not completely done. I’m working on a coggy collage that will go over the headboard. But I got tired of waiting. Anyway, y’all remember what it looked like, right? For those who don’t, here you go:

What a nightmare that was. There were days I wanted to take a rake to it. And a lighter.

And here is the after!!!

Airing Dirty Laundry

I have a confession to make. There is one room in the house I absolutely hate: the laundry room. It is uncomfortable in the extreme, plus it tends to be the catch-all for everything that has no place of its own. Random magazine? Laundry room stack. Empty votives? On top of the washer. Loose change? My pocket. It was a mess. And the sad part is, I really had no place to organize anything.

Then one day, a friend of mine posted on the social-site-with-faces that she managed to fit her behemoth washer and dryer combo against the far wall, freeing up a lot more room for her to actually open the doors of the machines without hitting her legs, and making it possible to fit her laundry sorter against the wall, where she has always wanted it. Well, I have behemoth machines, too, but I had my doubts as to whether they would fit in the same configuration. But I had hope, so I fetched the tape measure and ZOMG!!! I had about a foot leeway!!

My laundry room before:

Yeah….not very pretty. And before y’all cast any stones, that was the worst shape it has been in since I moved to this house. But it is very bad…awful…OMG I hope my mom isn’t seeing this. Anyway, I told Hubby of my plan to transform the laundry room, and he was more than happy to help me. It was the fastest way to Skyrim™, I’m sure!!

And laundry room after:

LOOK AT ALL THAT SPACE!!!!

We bought a restaurant rack and I managed to fit and organize everything with shelf area to spare. Even the kids are excited about doing their laundry. I’m not sure how long that will last, but I’ll milk it as long as I can 😀

FREEEEEDOM!!!!!

My friend, Princess Natasha, was kind enough to post this news on her social-site-with-faces profile. I thought it was my duty as poster of fluff here to make y’all aware of it.

Consider this your Public Service Announcement for today.

And guys, be sure to support them!!

Have a great day 😉

Do-It-Yourself: Chapter Two

Yesterday, I showed you the faux mercury glass I made for Eldest’s room makeover. I admit I went a little overboard, but like I said, I had other stuff to do, so it was best to get it out of my system so I could move on to the other accoutrements. Doing these went a lot faster, but a couple required curing time.

Which is just as well, since Eldest STILL hasn’t finished her room.

*Grumble, grumble*

First up, I have to let you in on the secret of my success:

This stuff glues glass!! AWESOME!!!

It glues fingers too, so be careful. E-6000 is my go-to glue for the stuff I never want to move again. Anyway, while at my neighbor’s estate sale, I noticed they had a small bell jar for $1. Hey, the Victorians were notorious for having specimens in those, right? So, I did the next best thing, because there was no way I was trapping a bunch of insects.

I simply punched out butterflies out of different colored cardstock, embossed them randomly, hotglued a small stick to the bell jar base, and then hotglued the butterflies onto the stick. DONE!! And no butterflies were harmed in the making of this bell jar display.

I also acquired a round silverplate serving dish for $3. Admittedly, I was actually going to use it for serving, but then I got a better idea. Monogramming became popular in large Victorian families, for obvious reasons. It was popular with my youngest sister too, until she remembered that all of us had the same initials. Eldest had a small block letter laying around the floor in her room, so I decided to put it to good use.

For the monogram sign, I painted the letter black, then adhered it to the dish with the E-6000. After curing for about 24 hours, I adhered the ribbon with more E-6000, reinforcing with duct tape. It looks so nice with the patina, which is great because that meant I didn’t have to polish it.

One thing I didn’t purchase was a gorgeous hurricane candle holder. It was way out of my price range, and I just couldn’t justify it. But it did give me an idea to make my own itty bitty little hurricane!!

I bought a round votive holder and a small candlestick at Dollar Tree™, and used E-6000 to glue them together. After curing for a couple of days, you have either a small hurricane to show off small pretties, or a wine glass, which is why I adhered the rose to the glass. No chance of using it for imbibing.

Total cost of these: less than $10, including the random stuff I had around and the E-6000. One tube of that will take you far, trust me.

And so will the fumes, so use it in a well ventilated area 😉

Aggie Tam

If y’all aren’t familiar with the TV show Firefly, and the film Serenity, then the title means nary a thing to ye. So, to explain:

The character is River Tam, and she is deadly. Especially with a reaver sword.

Anyway, this Monday I was scrubbing dog barf from the carpeting when the doorbell rang, causing said dogs to bark and jump and wag and generally make a nuisance. I had been warned informed that I was going to receive a package from the Lemur Compound™. I thought it might be in retaliation a thank you gift consisting of chocolate or turducken, in return for the gift I had sent. I was so happily wrong.

Behold Serena, my very own reaver sword!!! Yes, I named her Serena, after Serenity.

Look at that blade. JUST LOOK AT IT!!!!

Makes you feel tingly inside, doesn’t it?

Yes, the photos were taken with my iPhone 3 GS, which does no justice to the absolute beauty of the steel. And yes, the blade is very sharp. This isn’t just for looks. It’s for life.

I think this would look great with my Steampunk costume, don’t you? 😉

Thursday?? What the…??

I was so busy yesterday, I completely forgot to post fluff. Let’s face it: this blog is just fluff, but sometimes that’s what you need because there just isn’t enough Calgon™ to go around.

Anyway, yesterday I decided to go around town looking for cheap junk items of small value to alter for Eldest’s room. As y’all may recall, she wanted me to Steampunk the whole thing. Well, that’s hard to do when she keeps it looking like Hurricane Ike hit it.

And that, my friends, is a VAST improvement over what it was like only two days ago. Because you can walk around the room!! Yes, that’s a strip of duct tape on the corner. And she does write on the little mirrors. By the way, I warned her I would be posting a pic of the DMZ room, so this won’t freak her out. Much… Anyway, today I get to paint PVC pipes, cut up corks and foam insulation board. Oh, and do some fake mercury glass, because I am NOT paying out the nose for that stuff when I can easily fashion my own.

I can’t wait to finish her room, and then I will be waiting impatiently for her to move out so I can take it over 😀

My Empire for a Pillow

This post has been 30 years in the making. At least, it feels like it.

I have owned the same pillow since I was sixteen years old. I love my pillow. It’s latex, not feather, and I do get it dry cleaned on a regular basis, so don’t get all icky on me. Anyway, everyone tells you that you must replace your pillow every so-many-years, since pillows tend to “break”. And I have tried. Boy, have I tried….

The first replacement I bought in college. It was a feather/foam type. As soon as I lay on it, it just flattened. I was so disappointed, because the salesperson absolutely guaranteed I would sleep like a baby. Turns out I did. A colicky one.

The second time, I found a latex pillow, and I was ecstatic! It was JUST LIKE MINE!! We were in the process of moving from San Antonio to Fayetteville, NC, when I realized my pillow had been packed with all the household goods. GAH!! We went to some big name housestuff store, and I found it. It was just the right size, too: three inches at the middle thickness. That is important, as you will see later. Anyway, we drove out from Houston to Pensacola, and stayed at a La Quinta overnight. And in my hurry to pack up in the morning, I left my pillow in the hotel room!!

Some hotel staffer is sleeping well in Pensacola.

The third time was only two years ago. I decided to splurge on a memory foam pillow, because that’s all the rage and it’s supposed to conform to your head, blah, blah, blah… So I do. I spend $50 on a pillow, but I am prudent enough to keep my old one, just in case. I try it out that night, hoping against hope that it works.

And I ended up waking up feeling rather stabby. GAH!! This time, Little One ended up with the premium pillow. At least she loves that thing, so it wasn’t a waste of time or money.

I scoured all over town for latex pillows, and finally found one. Number Four was latex, and firm, and awesome. But it was four inches thick, and I ended up waking up with a crick in my neck every morning. So, Son becomes the proud owner of a very nice latex pillow, and Momma once again literally dusts off her old pillow for her use.

Fast forward to last Saturday. Hubby and I had been contemplating a new mattress set. The old one was fine, but the box spring tended to creak horribly if you so much as looked at it. So, you can let your imagination wander here. And….you can stop now. Suffice it to say, it wasn’t conducive to a good night’s sleep, either. So, we went to get a new set, and while purchasing the mattress, I spied another foam pillow. The salesman told me it was a top seller, and I tried it out. Seemed the right height, so I added it to the final purchase. I awaited its arrival in eager anticipation. FINALLY, a new pillow for me!!!

And after two nights of waking up in discomfort, I have to take it back. Short of me shaving off an inch from the pillow top, I don’t see how it can work for me. So, either Eldest will end up with it, or the store will.

All I know is, my old, trusty pillow will probably be with me forever. At least, until I get cremated. Then we will have to part, because burning latex can be toxic, and I don’t want that ending up in the sewage along with my ashes 😉

It’s Sunday!

And I got nothing for today.

Today I am going to the hardware stores in search of stuff for jewelry and Steampunk. Yes, I did say “jewelry”. But not for me. I have plenty. Well, ok…I do need to make some Steampunk style jewelry, so I should pick up more of these:

Oh, and I also have to cook something delish for Yabu. He has a fantabulous contest going on whereby we in the Blogosphere will be posting food pics and recipes!! It’s called the “NATIONAL IRRITATE A FOOD PIC HATER FOOD PIC POSTING WEEK” or NIAFPHFPPW for short. I shall be updating this blog with tonight’s feastology.

This is probably the most rambling post I’ve done this year.

Anyway, until then, have a great one, and feel free to join the foodie fun at Yabu’s!! 🙂

DELICIOUS UPDATE!!!

Slow Cooked Porkchops;

• Six thick-cut porkchops (boneless or bone-in)
• One bottle BBQ sauce
• One onion, halved and sliced.

Place porkchops in slow cooker, then layer onions over them, then pour bottle of BBQ sauce over it. Cook on low for 6 hours. Recipe stolen creatively borrowed from Laura a long time ago. Trust me, it is AWESOME!

Oh, and since I didn’t have any dinosaurs or fighter jets, I decided that Carl the Psycho Llama would grace the montage just fine. Tell me I’m wrong.

I dare ya 😉