Adults Say the Darnedest Things, Too

Most of y’all know I have a Jones for cast iron. Hubby knows to stop in at the Le Creuset™ factory outlet store first whenever he is dragged along accompanies me. We seldom get anything, but I do love to go in and look at all the pretty colors and make a mental list of all the pieces missing from my collection enjoy chatting with the sales people. Sometimes we manage to get a cooking demonstration in and that’s always fun. Especially if we get to sample it. Anyway, last time I was there, the sales gal told me that the company was re-issuing one of my Holy Grails.

The darling pepper-shaped cocotte!!!

I admit, I SQUEEE’d out loud in front of people when she told me. Yes, they looked at me funny. They always do anyway. We got back home in time for me to make dinner, and as we sat around the table, I gingerly brought up the subject of the cocotte. Keep in mind, one has to be very subtle when speaking about such things, especially when there is no occasion pending for the giving of presents.

Me: So (me being subtle)…….. you heard the sales gal say the pepper cocotte is back, right?

Hubby: *deep sigh*

Me: You know I have wanted that pot since the first time they issued it decades ago, right?

Hubby: *heaves sigh again, keeps eating*

Me: It’s like a Holy Grail, right?

Hubby: Honey, this isn’t Pokemon!! YOU CAN’T CATCH THEM ALL!!

Me: ……………….

Son: That’s epic, Dad.

Me: *glares at Son*

Hubby: *grins evilly*

Me: I may not play the games but I did watch the show, and I am going to catch this one.

Hubby: *deep sigh*

It may take a bit of time to save up for it, but hopefully I will have a baker’s rack all set up to display my preciouses by the time I do get it.

And I will get it. Oh yes, I will 😀

Thursday Never List

Today’s scribbly fluff deals with kindness. As a mom, I find it challenging to teach my kids how to be kind for kindness’ sake. It’s challenging because there are times when I want to go Rambo on some idiot taking up space at the dairy section, trying to decide if his soon-to-be carcass needs 2% or 1% milk. Seriously, is there such a life-threatening difference?? But it wouldn’t do to act like that in front of kids, or anyone for that matter. Nor would it do to be hostile to someone you don’t know simply because you are in a hurry to get creamer because you haven’t had your daily allotment of coffee.

Anyway, I understand there are times when it is very difficult, almost near impossible, to be kind. But there a some things which we should never pass up doing randomly for others.

#5– Never forget to wave

A simple acknowledgement like a hand wave goes a long way to make someone feel appreciated.

#4– Never forget to look behind you

Watching out for others makes one incredibly considerate.

#3– Never respond in anger

You can never take back words once spoken. Also, you can never take back words typed after hitting “send” or “enter”. Always read or think before you act.

#2– Never forget “Please” and “Thank you”

People aren’t your subjects, so don’t treat them like they are.

#1– Never forget to smile

People feel much better when they smile, and when it is returned. As a bonus, they will wonder if you are up to something.

There are many ways to show kindness to others. And by showing kindness, we get it in return.

Unless you are at the DMV. Then it’s a crap shoot 😉

Sith Tuesday!!

Today is Mardi Gras, the last day of indulgence before the start of the Lenten season.

Yay!! At least until tomorrow morning.

As y’all know, I go all out for Lent. I give up booze, and junk food, and sweets, and sodas, and fatty foods. This makes for a very cranky Sith Empress for a few days, and then I am back to my normal Death Star-shiny self. One good thing about giving up so much stuff is the lightness of being. By that, I mean the loss of holiday pounds that invariable stick around after the holidays like an unwanted guest.

I’m already looking forward to Easter Sunday.

Courtesy of Intergalactic Krewe of Chewbacchus

So go and have some fun, and enjoy festivities and drink and food and revelry. Catch some beads and sing along. For tomorrow will come soon enough.

And may your morning be free of nausea and headaches 😀

HAPPY TEXAS INDEPENDENCE DAY!!

WHOOP!!

So make sure to celebrate today in true Texas style!!

Have a wonderful Sunday 🙂

Thursday Never List

Everyone loves to give advice. Notice I didn’t say “good advice”. We give advice when asked for it, and we give advice unsolicited. Some of the best advice I have followed stemmed from someone’s experience, and not from pearls of wisdom. Some of the worst advice has come from trusted sources (I will never, EVER eat eggplant casserole again). The great thing about advice is not that you can follow it, but that you have the free will to ignore it as well. Unfortunately, the trick is to know when to do one or the other.

That’s usually when hilarity ensues, so you have that going for you.

There are some words of advice that people should never forget, though.

#5– Never go to bed angry

It doesn’t matter if some wizard cleaned your clock in World of Warcraft™ or if you’re miffed because your significant other forgot to DVR your TV show. Resolve your anger and you’ll sleep better. Or at least, sleep with both eyes closed instead of one open.

#4– Never go grocery shopping while hungry

There is a can of octopus in the refrigerator, purchased while having a craving for sushi. I bet that can will evolve into the Kraken before too long.

#3– Never leave chocolate unattended

I speak as a victim. And also as a culprit. Don’t judge me.

#2– Never leave wet towels on the floor

Especially if you have dogs. Double especially if you have wet dogs.

#1– Never skip dessert

Some say with the sweet, comes the sour. I say with dessert, comes happiness. It sure makes for a sweet ending to whatever type of day you are having.

So there’s a few random words of unsolicited advice. As always, take with a grain of sugar or two 😉

Retail Therapy

I don’t care what some people say, I firmly believe everyone enjoys retail therapy to some degree. Whether you are buying ammo or new shoes, or shopping for others or yourself, it makes no difference. There is a part of you that really, really feels good about it.

For some guys, it may be a very tiny part, but it’s there. Especially if it involves booze. Or bacon. Or bullets.

We women get a bad rap for it, but we don’t all follow the norm. For example, I have three sisters. Last evening Sister #2 called to tell me she had bought some furniture for the empty room upstairs, and was so giddy about it she was giggling. Sister #3 sent an MMS to all of us showing her new shoes, which she purchased at a major discount (And I mean MAJOR: Nicole Miller heels for $4.98). And Sister #4 and I (I’m Sister #1, in case y’all wondered) usually SQUEEE over the Lolita glasses we *ahem* acquire. The funny thing is, it doesn’t have to be expensive or blingy or showy for retail therapy to work its magic on your psyche.

It just has to make you happy. Admittedly, a gorgeous diamond ring would make most women happy, and a Ferrari would make most men happy, too. But high maintenance would take away that first blush of happiness and replace it with resentment soon enough. Not that I would know first hand about that, though.

Sure would be fun to try it for a few weeks, though 😉

Forget Hoverboards

Next year is 2015, the year Marty McFly went to the future.

I don’t care about a hoverboard. They short over water anyway. But there are some things I do want with the coming future.

1. A dryer that folds your clothes. Lost in Space had one. We’ve had over 50 years to come up with one and the only meaningful improvement on a dryer is the addition of wrinkle guard.
2. Over-the-counter codeine. Australia has it, for goodness’ sake! Then again everything there can kill you, so maybe that’s why.
3. Coffee I.V. Surely this is viable by now??
4. Instant nail color. Zorg’s secretar– I mean, administrative assistant had a gizmo in The Fifth Element that would change your nail color and had NO DRYING TIME. I’m tired of gnats landing on my nail polish before it’s dry.

If I had to pick just one of the above, I would be hard pressed between coffee I.V. and the dryer. I’m sure the dryer would win out after a few nanoseconds of thought on the matter. After all, there’s Keurig now, right?

Seriously, tech gods, is this too much to ask?? 😀

Thursday Never List

The other day I had the misfortune of jamming my nail into the back of a chair, causing the nail to bend back and rip from the bed in a very alarming, not to say painful manner.

I cried like a little girl. I admit it.

Once I took care of the bleeding and the whining, I went to look for a bandage to hold my nail down so that it wouldn’t rip any further.

Nothing in my medicine cabinet.

Nothing in the medicine basket in the kitchen.

Nothing in the first aid kit.

Finally I find a box of bandages buried under who knows how many empty bottles and leftover soaps and dried up nail polishes inside the kids’ bath cabinet. So, I am remedying that oversight today. And cleaning out the crap that has collected due to lazy kids.

Stuff One Should Never Be Without in a Medicine Cabinet

#5– Aspirin

Be all and end all of pain relievers, acne sufferers, and let’s not forget those with heart issues.

#4– Isopropyl alcohol

I have to make that distinction. Otherwise, people would stock Everclear™.

#3– Bandages

Blood is sure pretty, unless it’s your own.

#2– Bismuth solution

For every abdomen ailment. And it’s pink! BONUS!!

#1– Topical antibiotic

I must have seventeen tubes of Neosporin™, Lanacane™, and Bacitracin™ all over the house. And I’m of the opinion it’s STILL not enough.

Anyway, I hope y’all have a wonderful Thursday and enjoy the day not needing any of these items. I’m off to clean out the massive collection of crap under the cabinet. Here’s hoping none of it is radioactive by now 🙂

Blood, Sweat, and Tears

Also known as Valentine’s Day!

Sorry about skipping yesterday’s TNL, but I had to go downtown to pay the property taxes, which took HOURS since there was some sort of spill on the highway, which meant I had to take backroads that were scary enough to send me into prayer, and then arrive to stand in line among the living and the dead (they had been there so long), and finally, painfully hand over a cheque to the smiling young clerk. By the time I made it home, it was too late to make dinner, much less write a post.

And there ends my justification.

Anyway, back to Valentine’s Day. Around here, I don’t really celebrate it for myself as much as I do for the kids and Hubby. It’s not that I am jaded on the holiday. It’s just that loving someone shouldn’t require a specific day. But that doesn’t mean I don’t try to make the day special in some way. So here is a list of things one should never forget to do for their loved ones.

#5– Carry their burden

Big or small, physical or emotional, it doesn’t matter as long as you make it your own, even for a short time.

#4– Wash their hair

Or give them a foot rub, or massage their shoulders. Anyone that watched Out of Africa knows what I’m talking about.

#3– Be their harbor

No matter what the trouble, be there to offer them safety. You are their shield.

#2– Listen

No matter that it’s gossip or complaints, just listen to them. Usually that is all we want anyway.

#1– Tell them you love them

Sometimes we forget to do that. So don’t.

Anyway, I hope y’all enjoy today, be it in celebration of Valentine’s Day or because it’s Friday finally. I’m going with the latter 😉

Sunday Sithy

Do you ever wake up disoriented from a weird dream and feel the dream follows you when you’re awake?

That’s how my day started.

Last night I fell asleep watching The Fifth Element, and woke up to Mimic, and of course cockroaches with Jean Paul Gauthier costumes were involved in my dream. And as all of humanity was succumbing to the giant cockroaches’ will to rule the galaxy (I think that’s from Men in Black) while infiltrating our brains (maybe The Wrath of Khan), all I could think about is how they got such tiny rooster feathers to fit around the necks of their fur coats. So, this morning as I go to the kitchen to feed the Sheltie, I see a weird shaped leaf on the tile and immediately freak out because it looks like a cockroach sporting a cane. But it was just a leaf with a stem. Once again, this is why I shouldn’t eat sweets late in the evening.

So, here’s a Sithy to cleanse the insect fashion palate.

My late BIL Draco would have snorted his coffee out his nose at that 😀

Hope y’all have a wonderful Sunday!!