Hard to Keep the Glamour Goddess Chained Sometimes

There are times when I amaze myself with my convoluted reasoning.

I will be the first to admit that I loathe to wear makeup. There are days I don’t even comb my hair, much less think of getting rid of the gray white. If I am not leaving the house, what’s the point, right? Kids don’t care and Hubby thinks I look just fine as I am. Something for which I am devoutly thankful.

But then I hear everyone telling him how young he looks, and I kinda get a wee bit….. discomfited. I have no problem growing older, or even looking older. But I do want to at least look the same age as he does. And it certainly doesn’t help when my friends counsel me to “look like an officer’s wife”. At least I already act like one, so I have that going for me. But Vanity reared her beautifully coiffed head, and so in a panic I got new makeup during the Black Friday sales.

We’re talking new eyeshadows, nail colors, lipsticks, mascara, the works. If that doesn’t polish me into a semiprecious, rough cut topaz, I don’t know what will. But no matter what anyone says, I am keeping my gray. God kindly gave me highlights, and you just don’t mess with perfection 😉

Words and Wisdom and Wit

A few days ago, Hubby and I were talking to Eldest about facing her fears. One of the questions that always helps me facing adversity is “What would Jesus do?” In the same vein, we suggested that she try to emulate strong role models of fine character such as Winston Churchill.

One really can never go wrong with Churchill. Not even while being diplomatic.

Anyway, things came to a halt when Hubby suggested Teddy Roosevelt. Why? Because I nixed it. Puzzled they were when I said to emulate Alice Roosevelt instead.

Hubby: Who?

Me: Alice, Teddy’s daughter.

Eldest: Uh, why?

Me: Teddy Roosevelt once said, “I can run the country, or I can control Alice. I can not do both.”

Eldest: Wow….

Me: And really, how could you not admire someone who said, “If you have nothing nice to say, come sit by me”??

Hubby: *snort*

I think I made my point 😀

Thursday Never List

So I skipped a week. It was THANKSGIVING!! I sincerely hope y’all enjoyed your holiday as much as I did. We had friends and family from near and far come to gather, and I wish I could do this at least once a week. As long as the kids do the dishes, anyway.

Anyway, today is Thursday, and it is time for another Never List™. Sometimes my lists don’t make any sense. Ok, most of the time. And this one is no different. But still, fun to do. Today finds me appreciating my accidental collection of vintage stuff. Some items have a history, and others do not. But all of them have a purpose, which makes them indispensable.

Things You Should Never Throw Away

#5– Tupperware

Seriously, it lasts forever, and it’s very low maintenance. I have yet to stop using pieces I acquired back in 1985.

#4– Mason jars

There is no end to their uses. I started buying old ones because the blue matched my kitchen way back when I first got married. Imagine my shock at the prices for vintage mason jars today. And to think, they hold my thread spools and coffee. Not together though.

#3– Costume jewelry

Because everything old becomes new and more expensive all over again.

#2– Vinyl records

I think we have three moving boxes worth of records, from 78s to 45s and everything in between. And I still listen to them.

#1– Photographs

They always tell a story, even those whose voices have been lost. I even keep the ones I find in old frames I buy from the thrift store. I can’t bear to part with them, even if I have no idea who they are.

So here is your list of nevers for this week. With the possible exception of the turntable which is implied, y’all will notice no technological gizmos made my list. Why? Because they are evul 😉

Conversations With the Sheltie

She’s not technically my dog. But that doesn’t stop her from acting like it.

Every morning it’s the same conversation. I get up, and she jingles over to my door in expectation that her mistress will cater to her needs. I give her some kibble, and after she inhales it she runs over to the door and barks her command.

“YIP YIP, YIP!!!”

(Open the door, NOW!!)

Once she is done, she lets me know, again…

“YIP!!”

(I’m DONE!!)

Then she waits patiently for 7 AM. Why? Because Son’s friend comes over to pick him up.

“YIP!! YIP YIP YIP YIP!!! YIP YIP!!”

(OMG!! YOU’RE HERE!! YOU’RE HERE!! MOM, SHE’S HERE!!)

Then Hubby makes an entrance into the kitchen, and she shuts up. She knows better than to rile him early. But once he walks out to the car, she starts up again.

“YIP YIP YIP!! YIP YIP YIP!!”

(There is a person WALKING OUTSIDE!!!)

Whereupon she runs away from any perceived threat, yipping like she has new vocal chords. It’s a good thing the house quietens down after a while. I would hate to do impromptu surgery on a dog. 😀

Thursday Never List

I am a fan of sugar. I love it. Candy is dandy, y’all. I am the type that takes her time savoring sugar, be it a candy bar or hard candy. No matter, it is sugar and it should be properly consumed. But every wonderful thing has a flip side, and sometimes you have to draw the line, even where your sweet tooth is concerned. You can imagine the angst I feel during Halloween.

It’s hellish, y’all.

No Sense Candy

#5– Baby Bottle Pop

Sucking on a candy pacifier may indicate severe mental trauma. Same goes for the stupid ring pops.

#4– Push Pops

Uh, if I have to work at getting the candy, it’s not worth the trouble.

#3– Eyeballs

I had to eat sheep eyes once, and this just sends me into paroxysms of rage.

#2– Spiced Candy

Wasabi, jalapeno, serrano, jolokia, I don’t care. NO SPICY PEPPERS belong in candy. EVER.

#1– Insect Lollipops

Whoever thought coating a dead scorpion in hard candy was a good idea should be rotting in Hades.

Now, time to eat some chocolate to wash out the bad taste from this post 😉

Tourism, Texas Style

I love my state. There is always some exotic attraction no matter where you are. And by “exotic”, I don’t mean a gentleman’s club. Though there’s a few of those too. No, I mean weird.

Today we shall be going here. That’s right, the SNAKE FARM!!!

ZOMG!!! Isn’t he adorable?? But it’s not just a reptile place. They have a petting zoo and rescue exotics from around the world. The farm was featured on an episode of Dirty Jobs, and Mike Rowe was a snake handler. He was thisclose to me and I missed out. It still pains me to this day. Anyway, we hope to catch a show or maybe feeding time. A LIVE feeding!!

And then we shall go to lunch 😀

Thursday Never List for Friday

Running late, because the White Rabbit is off smoking a hooka or something.

And by that I mean I had to pick up Tiberius from the airport and clean house beforehand. At least I cleaned the kids’ bathroom.

So here’s a list of random Nevers for y’all.

Random Never List

#5– Never Go Anywhere Without ID

I cannot stress the importance of this. Especially in Bangkok.

#4– Never Pass Up the Opportunity to Dance

There is no such thing as a bad dancer when you are enjoying yourself, Elaine.

#3– Never Give Up Your Principles

They are worth far more to you than to others.

#2– Never Confuse Kindness With Flattery

The results can be bad. Really bad.

#1– Never, Ever Pass Up a Good Thing

*SMOOOCH*

Hope y’all have a wonderful Friday 😉

Thursday Never List

As a rule, I am not one to buy into hype. Much. Sure, I see some gorgeous model trying to get you to buy mascara that will make your lashes visible from the moon, and I am so there. But that’s pretty much as far as I go. Ok, that and kitchen stuff. BUT THAT’S IT!!

For the most part, As Seen on TV stuff tends to go away faster than seem to stick around. Others tend to live in infamy.

Things Never to Buy From TV

#5– My Secret Hair Enhancer Aerosol

Gentlemen, spraying a bald spot will only bring attention to it.

#4– Slim Away Body Wrap

Just FYI, Saran Wrap™ is way cheaper. So I hear.

#3– Perfect Pancake Pan

If you suffer from serious OCD issues, this is the pan for you. If you don’t, any regular pan will work.

#2– Perfect Polly Pet

If you don’t know, that is an animatronic parakeet. That’s really all you need to know.

#1– Pajama Jeans

No, just no.

Now, there are some fun things out in TV Pitchland that I admit I own. First up would be none other than the ShamWOW. That sucker has worked like a charm, and I don’t regret buying it for a minute.

Next up, a Chia Pet™ 😀

Where Did the Week Go??

Oh, right.

Today finds me doing all the mundane stuff I put off while my friend was visiting. Sure, I put it off using the excuse of the visit. Who wouldn’t?? Exactly! Anyway, laundry can no longer be hidden must be done. But I figure I have time for a random drive-by post full of delicious nothingness.

Next to beer braised beef, that is my speciality.

I think my favorite kitchen utensil is my Santoku knife.

There are four different flavors of fudge in the refrigerator right now. There will be three by this evening, I’m sure.

There is nothing so comforting as eating a bowl of hearty soup while a cold front moves in.

Never clean up fallen acorns. It’s deer crack, and you get to enjoy fattening up venison while they clean it up and fertilize your lawn. Total win.

It is unethical to raid your kid’s Halloween candy stash. It is far more acceptable to beg and plead for candy and embarrass them in front of their friends.

Never pass up the opportunity to buy something for yourself. It doesn’t matter if it’s a dress or a saucepan.

And more importantly, never pass up the opportunity to be kind. The rewards are beyond rubies.

Anyway, time for me to get moving. I have spent enough time trolling for makeup and jewelry reading online. Y’all have a great day!! 😀

Oh, Sunday….

….how I *heart* you.

The house is quiet, since kids sleep in. The dogs are happy on their patch of sunshine, and the coffee is muy excelente.

Of course, all that will change when football comes on.

But until then, I shall relish the peace and quiet. So until then, enjoy a Sithy.

Hope y’all have a wonderful Sunday 😀