How I Spent My Summer Vacation

It was a great week, and wonderful to get away from the dry heat here to the humid heat there!

The first day we just unwound, enjoying the views and the sound of the water below. As y’all know, the second day we went bowling, and it was a blast, especially witnessing my failings at it. That evening we decided to try fishing from the balcony.

Seriously, how can one pass that up, right??? But unfortunately most of the fish were scared off due to the high traffic on the lake, so nothing bit. But Hubby is never discouraged. We got out to the store and get chicken livers for bait. Apparently, catfish really like that stuff.

Gutterballs

Our first day at the lake, I was greeted with a beautiful sunrise, waves lapping gently against the rocks, and herons flying overhead. The morning was tranquil, and made perfect by my cup of coffee.

But good things don’t last forever, and so we woke the kids and asked them what they would like to do on such a beautiful day.

BOWLING!!

Uh, ok. We drove 250 miles and rented a condo ON the lake so that we could do…. what we can do at home. But the point of vacation is to have fun, and so we headed out to the bowling alley. And I must admit, it sure was fun. I had a record-breaking 42 gutterballs in three games. But I also scored some pins, and apparently I was very creative about it.

Son: (after I scored ONE pin) Hey, Mom! Now if you score another pin, and then score two, and then score three, and then score five, you’ll be on your way to doing the Fibonacci Sequence!

Me: So, my plan to establish a pattern is working.

Son: Yep.

Me: Uh huh.

Hey, it was a great excuse to explain my lack of prowess 😉

Guess What???

I’m still busy. I know. Y’all are just SHOCKED. I can tell.

Today I was up before 6 AM to take the older two kidlets to the ROTC Fish Camp. Then I drove through traffic so congested it needed Nyquil™ in order to drop off my BIL at the barracks in time for his appointment today. I raced home, only to remember to stop to get some groceries, because dishes need dishwashing liquid in order to get clean. Also I was out of coffee creamer, and I was actually doing the kids a favor by getting some. That way they wouldn’t have to deal with a cranky mom tomorrow, when I have to do this all over again, only with a trip to the mall included. Oh, and school registrations are this week, along with prep days and school portraits and my appointment at the hospital, and packing for our vacation.

Hopefully a week at the lake will relax me.

I get the funny feeling I’ll be doing pretty much the same stuff I do here, only with a lake attached. Whatever…as long as there’s wine and the noise is lower than 1200 decibels 😉

Sundays, and Doughnuts, and Dogs

Well, it’s Sunday. We have a houseful of guests, so I suggested to hubby to go get DOUGHNUTS!!

We were triumphant in our endeavors. We returned with many delectable varieties for the masses, including this one for moi:

Raspberry-filled glazed deliciousness. You are drooling, I can tell. But Life has a way of making fun of me when I least expect it. You see, this post was originally going to regale you with the sweet nothings of the aforementioned doughnut. But alas, it is not to be. As I got up to get more coffee, my big dog Lenny took the opportunity to help herself to my slice of heavenly sinful sugary goodness!!!

That. Broke. My. Heart.

So, I shall make do with a kolache. And an additional cup of coffee to quell the desire to yell at my dog for taking the one joy I looked forward to today. But not to worry. I’m sure the Moscato will be flowing this afternoon 🙂

Yay…Me….

So yesterday Hubby was getting the boxes that contained his office regalia out of the garage, and I found even more crap to go donate to Goodwill, because any thought I ever entertained about using the super gem table lamp and the garish silk table covers have gone out the window with his “Omg… you still have that??” look from when he spied it. So, some of the stuff will go to Goodwill, some to my niece, and some to Nicole, because she loves sparklies as much as I do.

Super gem table lamp.

And that is my recycling bin. I’m classy that way. I’m sure my niece will love that lamp for her little one. Hopefully I will have made a big enough dent in the pile that Hubby will not complain for lack of space. After the crap has been distributed or packed up, I shall begin organizing the tools and the books. I hope that the rain continues so that I don’t bake out there. If temperatures rise above 95* F, then I will shove everything out the garage door and pray that someone will come by and pick up their new treasures.

Hopefully before Hubby returns 😉

The Butter Incident

I love my dog. She is the sweetest, gentlest, neurotic ball I know. Even more neurotic than I am. But she makes every day funny somehow.

She also likes to test her boundaries.

A while back, I was in the kitchen making something that required fattiness. In this case, it was butter. I love baking with sweet cream unsalted butter. It makes me very happy. Anyway, I had set aside the last stick of butter on the kitchen island and was measuring the rest of the ingredients, when my dog, that loveable fuzzball, decided that HEY!!! THAT’S SWEET BUTTAH!!!

And she promptly leaned up, swiping the rest of it onto her tongue.

Courtesy of CakeSpy

I was not happy, and when Momma ain’t happy….

Needless to say, I did no baking that day. The dog also got no treats that day. She has since learned that the counters are off limits, as is the table. In retrospect, it’s pretty funny how she managed to sneak that, but I really wanted to bake whatever it was I felt like making.

Nowadays I make sure to have at least two packages of butter in the refrigerator at all times 😉

Family Ties

This weekend we shall be travelling to Hubby’s family reunion. We always get excited about it, because so many people show up, and it’s always fun to catch up on news, as well as see the new additions and witness the many re-tellings of family histories.

It’s also the best time to wager who will wig out first. “Crazy” is a relative term in our family.

Every year, we are asked to bring something for consumption for the masses. Travelling for four hours makes it tricky, so I can never bring any hot foods. Most of the time I bring dessert, but so do most people coming in from out-of-town. So, this year I shall bring some of this, and some Solo© Cups.

I know it will be gone in 60 seconds.

But no worries. I will be designated driver, just so I can write down all the delish gossip for Sithy. There will be plenty, I’m sure. When you have Bible thumpers and Wiccans in the same venue, hilarity will ensue 😉

I’m Officially a Cantankerous Old Lady

And I am being kind.

Yesterday, I was outside trimming the dead branches off my Pride of Barbados shrubs, bushes….whatever they are. They are supposed to grow to six feet, and mine are ten feet tall. Yes, I need a stepstool. Anyway, I was off in my little world of garden beautification when I hear kids walking into the cul-de-sac. Normally this is fine, but I know the kids around here are all gone for vacation somewhere. So I turn to look and see that they are walking up the sidewalk, tossing a football back and forth. “How cool,” I think to myself. I like to see kids being active.

And then the coolness factor stopped when they got on my crappy lawn to throw the football on a long pass!!!

Me: Excuse me, but you are on the lawn.

Kid #1: We are throwing a football.

Me: I see that, but you need to respect people’s property.

Kid #2: It’s just a football, man.

Me: That’s “Lady”, and GET OFF MY LAWN!!

The only thing missing was my shotgun.

The machete may have intimidated them, though. Now, I am not one to freak out if someone is on my crappy lawn, ok? The kids around the cul-de-sac have come and gone with their skateboards, bikes, rollerblades, whatever. But they had asked if it was ok. These kids took it for granted that the whole place was their playing field, and that is just wrong. Respect for other people’s property is something we were taught as kids. I get the vibe some of us are slacking off in teaching that lesson.

Now, I’m off to go dig some holes for yet another Pride of Barbados and a few Lumbagos. I can’t seem to kill those. If I start yelling at the birds to get off my lawn, I’ll know I have a problem 😉

Lazy Afternoon

Well, the morning got away from me. I’ll get her back tomorrow, don’t y’all worry.

This is the last day of school for my kidlets. That means Purgatory for me, at least once Hubby returns to work. So far, there has only been one fight disagreement. Vast improvement over last year. But the day is still young.

Today is very overcast, and I hear the rumble of thunder. Hopefully it will rain enough to keep the lawn green for a few days. Otherwise I have to go out and hand-water while providing my legs for a mosquito smorgasbord.

I’m feeling a bit low, and think that perhaps-maybe I should get a doughnut.

*looks at the time*

*realizes all doughnuts shops are closed*

*shakes fist at Morning, cursing her bloody*

Ok, fine!!! Tomorrow I will get a doughnut. A JELLY ONE!!! 😀

A Bit Nippy

As God is my witness, I am not making this up.

Yesterday, the window on my van was repaired. That required the presence of a “stranger” in my driveway. My neighbor’s dog, an awesome, well-trained Australian Shepherd, was consequently driven nuts by the fact that someone he doesn’t know was in such close proximity to the area he is tasked to guard. I could hear him barking even while I was inside my house. Anyway, my neighbor was also dogsitting for her parents’ Aussie, a much younger, active, less-trained puppy. This puppy has the gift of egging other dogs on about barking and chasing and doing the things dogs normally do, only at a few orders of magnitude. In other words, the puppy is usually the instigator.

Not the actual Aussie, but gorgeous nonetheless!

After the repairman left, I moved the van into the garage, and then proceeded to go move the Pathfinder to the driveway, since I had parked it on the street. My neighbor, blessed woman that she is, was out with both dogs letting them relieve themselves. Her dog wasn’t on a leash, because he is trained to stay on the lawn. Before I go any further, I must underline how much I like this dog. As I walked down my driveway, perilously close to my neighbor’s yard, the dog, still in protective mode, charges at me. As taught, I stand my ground, and as HE was taught, he charges again.

My neighbor is screaming at her dog while frantically holding on to the instigator puppy.

On the second charge, the dog finds something to nip at. Now, my arms were at my sides, and I was standing sideways to him by this time. The only thing he can detect, small as it is, is my *ahem* upper pectoral milk decanting device. As I said, he is well-trained, so he only nipped at it.

But holy cow that was more than enough!!!

In tears, I get in the Pathfinder and move it, while my neighbor is calming and reinforcing training on her dog. I get out to let her know I’m fine, and hilarity ensues.

Neighbor: ARE YOU OK????

Me: Yes, it hurt a bit but..

Neighbor: OMIGAWD!! Did (name redacted to protect the innocent) bite you???

Me: Just a nip, nothing serious, really. (I am trying to calm her down by now)

Neighbor: Where??

Me: Uh…. (pointing).

Neighbor: OMIGAWD!!! Did he break skin???

(Keep in mind if a dog does draw blood, it must be quarantined for 72 hours, and the person treated for it)

Me: Oh no… not at all. I’m fine.

Neighbor: Are you sure? Take a picture of it and send it to me.

Me: (Laughing) No offense, but that is something I would only do for Hubby!!

Luckily, I am married to a doctor who took it upon himself to *ahem* check it over to make sure it was ok. Yes, it’s a bit tender, but it will heal. Suffice it to say, the dog was very contrite, and did snuggle up to me to make up for it. He sure is an awesome dog, but apparently takes that whole “take a bite out of crime” thing to extremes 😉