Category Archives: Randomness

Thursday Sithy

I’ve been trying to post everywhere I blog all morning, and come to realize that my main blog is the one I neglect the most. When my sources of amusement include going to the thrift store and finding substitutes for everything I gave up for Lent, you know I have a boring life. So here’s a Sithy to tide you over for a bit.

darth vader polish statue

I can’t tell you how much I โค Poland!!

Have a great day ๐Ÿ˜‰


It’s Already Lent, and I Am Praying for Easter

It just started, literally just last week! And I am already a whiny, petulant child. Every year is the same thing: I give up sweets, fats, junk food, and booze. It’s not only a sacrifice but also a secular test of my will power.

I didn’t give up caffeine, though. You wouldn’t like me if I did.

This year my will power is being sorely tested. A friend brought me cookies. I have to make banana bread today. Last night was the “Chocolate Edition” of Cutthroat Kitchen, and to make matters worse, Chef Damiano, a contestant on the last season ofย Spring Baking Championship and who was total eye candy, won. I am surrounded by sweets of all kinds.

I have the feeling that soon enough it will be junk food tempting me. Possibly fatty foods cleverly disguised as junk food. I’m not so worried about the temptation of wine and vodka, because I can honestly take it or leave it as long as I have sweets. This is going to be….difficult.

But until then, my sense of humor is still intact. So enjoy the peep show until you can partake!

peepshow

Have a great Monday ๐Ÿ˜‰


Well, 2016 Is Off to a Rocky Start…

It has been rough getting the motivation to write. Lately I have had to catch up on my health, getting yearly check-ups, making sure bones aren’t dissolving, etc. With the start of a new year, many people are beginning the “New Year, New You” routines for better health.

I am not really among them.

But I do plan on improving myself in certain areas. I have been learning to redo and repair furniture (my sister Reno Queen would be proud), purging paperwork that is decades old (found boxes in the garage that I thought were full of books, go figure), learning to patch plaster and drywall, and of course, painting everything in sight. I found a little Florentine table that had lost most of its gilt and decided to paint it in ASCP Emperor’s Silk, a red that should have been called French Bordello, in my opinion. Wait until I post the “before and after” so you can see what I mean.

I also have plans to continue my vocational education, and learn welding. No, I never saw Flashdance. It’s just something I’ve always wanted to learn. I figure if I can do well in it I can use it for artistic purposes, because who wouldn’t want to make their own version of an Alexander Calder mobile, right?? I think learning vo-tech is a good way to stay active in the coming seasoned years, so to speak. Lord knows I am not about to start jogging or doing Zumba. If I didn’t start when I was younger, it ain’t happening when I’m older.

Hopefully my resolution to learn how to use all sorts of power tools will culminate in re-organizing the garage into a working work station. Here’s looking at maybe six weeks of work. Well, if I start now, that is. After all, there’s bound to be something that crops up to stall me. Last week, it was friends from out of town. I imagine this week will involve a package of Fig Newtons and aย Firefly marathon.

A gal has to have priorities ๐Ÿ˜‰


The Year in Review, Sorta

Well, another year is coming to a close. I have been remiss in blogging due to the holiday and family commitments, none of which involved a mental institution. Well, none so far. After all, the holiday isn’t over yet.

Every year around this time I find myself sighing deeply. It’s not a contented “I ate all the chocolate and feel NO SHAME” sigh, nor is it the “I wish they could stay home longer” sigh. It’s the “What happened ?” sigh. For a while, it seemed this year just dragged on and on, and suddenly–BAM!!!–it’s December 31st and I have no idea how that happened. School band, having a split household, dealing with kids away for the first time, family happenings, all take their toll and can be serious time sucks. And let’s not forget social media. That alone can make the days seem like minutes, especially when a soap opera is unfolding on the social-site-with-faces.

By the way, I started writing this post two days ago.

As usual, with the end of the year come the reflections and the resolutions. Upon reflecting on my year, I found a few truths to be rather self-evident: I am quite lax at writing, technology still escapes me, I don’t laugh at myself as much as I should. I am loathe to write of resolutions because they are lofty goals usually mired in dreams and cotton candy. So this year I resolve not to make any resolutions save one: to be happy with my lot in life, and grateful for all my blessings.

I guess that’s TWO resolutions. But they will be easy to keep.

Hope y’all have a safe and wonderful New Year’s Day, and blessings to y’all in the coming year ๐Ÿ˜€


Oh, Look! Aggie Decided to Write a Post!!

Finally. Ok, to recap the last couple of weeks:

Halloween was fun. I dressed as a Crazy Cat Lady and managed to impress three Darth Vaders, 12 Capts. America, four Iron Men, four Mighty Morphin’ Power Rangers (only the Blue and the Black were MIA), and five Wonder Women.

I lost count on the Elsas and the fairy princesses and the ninjas.

The best costume went to toddler boys dressed as ketchup and mustard bottles. ADORBS!! Next year I will have to step up my game, though. Competition for original costumes is tough and I aim high.

As y’all may recall, I had a very long list of stuff I was going to redo, refinish, upcycle, whatever term is in fashion now. So far in the past three weeks I have managed to finish the frames and the pumpkin topiaries on that list. In case you think I have been slacking off, I added more stuff to my list and have managed to finish chalk painting a side table, Homecoming mum and garter to match, more book art, Christmas gifts (no, I won’t post photos or descriptions because I know who reads my blog), and painted a mirror, stool and little vanity table for my sister. In between thrift store skulking, I also have the privilege of being a band parent. And wouldn’t you know it? The team made the play-offs.

Yay, me….

So that’s the round-up. I hope to get back to writing fluff soon. It’s a bit difficult when you have table wax stuck under your fingernails, paint on your face, and glue in your hair. Honestly, I don’t know how that happened. It’s a risk I take in the pursuit of crafting ๐Ÿ™‚


Regrets of the Sith

I’ve always held fast to the belief that one should never have regrets. They tend to steep one in melancholy, or make one bitter, and nobody has time for that. That usually applies to big things, like letting go of the love of your life, or throwing away a winning lottery ticket. But little regrets? Sure, plenty of those to mull over a glass of vino.

I regret not ordering the molten lava cake the other night.

I regret not learning to knit.

I regret listening to Air Supply when I was in Junior High.

I regret matching my socks to my shirt.

I regret paying money to see Ishtar.

I regret not saying “goodbye” to my German neighbor.

I regret not keeping in touch with old friends.

I regret dyeing my hair Chocolate Cherry.

Those are but a few of my “pocket regrets”, the ones I keep in my pocket to remind me that things could have been worse. Regrets can choke you and stunt you, but reminding yourself that small ones happen can stimulate you into taking chances instead of holding you back for fear of failure. Can you imagine passing up an opportunity to be in a shark cage?? I didn’t, and I’m grateful my uncle was too chicken to do it alone.

So here’s to the little regrets, and may they always motivate y’all to keep living, and not just existing ๐Ÿ˜‰


Total Disconnect

Today I had the pleasure of taking Hubby’s car in to have a few tweaks done to the rotors. I was prepared to spend at least two hours in the walk in freezer waiting area. I had a book and I had my Kindle, in case I finished my book. As y’all know, I prefer actual paper over electronic when it comes to reading material, but I couldn’t make up my mind on what other book to take so I took the Kindle because it had a variety from which to choose.

Thus endeth my justification.

So, I hand over the key and decide to go watch a trainwreck for a bit. Maury was on. I enter the waiting area to find a gentleman sitting across from the TV, managing his phone and his iPad thingy. He looks up and sees me and asks if he can change the channel to a less vomitous fare. I acquiesce, and proceed to take out my book and reading glasses (sob), and lose myself in the tale of intrigue.

I was lost exactly three minutes.

The gentleman finished managing his phone and turns to me to tell me how much he loves texting. When I say he loves it, I mean it. He LOVES it. He proceeds to tell me how handy it is to use when he wishes to tell his boss he isn’t going in to work (so that he doesn’t have to fake a cough on the phone). He prefers to do his break-ups over text so he doesn’t have to hear the “Did I do something wrong?” or the “Is it me??” whining from women (his words). He really enjoys the short messaging that forces people to be concise and devoid of any emotion when communicating.

He spent an hour talking to me in the most animated way about how he hates talking to people because they are emotional and needy. He spent an hour talking to me after his keys had been returned and he had paid for the services. And not once did he see the irony in the conversation. It’s a bit sad that all I had to contribute to the conversation were monosyllabic answers and a few nods of the head. But that was all I could get in, really. He finally noticed the time and bid me a farewell, and left to go back to work. I sat there in the now-silent waiting area and felt like I was on a flat sea. I can’t imagine feeling about human interaction the way he does. I hate texting. There is no emotion in it, and it’s not like you can imagine hand gestures and loud exclamations with a smiley face. And I need the hand waving and loudness, believe me.

I thought about that as I held up my book to avoid eye contact with the new customer who came in. I was justified, since she changed the channel to The View. And there is just so much human interaction I can take from that ๐Ÿ˜€


A Woman and Her Dog

My Shetland Shepherd, Ivy, got sick for a few days and decided she would decorate my hardwood floors with the contents of her innards. She is fine now, but the stench emanating from her posterior required her human to do the unthinkable: give her a bath. This required a bit of preparation, since she is endowed with a very long, very sheddy coat. After about 40 minutes of combing through tangles, leaves, dead grass clippings, and *ahem* dried bowel contents matted to her backside, I began to prepare for the coming dread.

Me: Ok, time for a bath, Ivy!

Ivy: (looks at me puzzled) I’m sorry, what is this that you speak of?

Me: Time to get you clean. In the tub. With soap and water.

Ivy: (comprehension dawns) OMG OMG OMG I’M GOING TO GET WET!!!

Me: (places her in tub of warm water) Don’t be scared, sweetie.

Ivy: WHAT MANNER OF FRESH HELL IS THIS??

Me: Calm down, it’s WATER!!

Ivy: THIS IS NOT ACCEPTABLE! YOU ARE DOING IT WRONG!

Me: (handles washcloth) It’s ok, don’t panic.

Ivy: Oh, ok… you got the washcloth. You may proceed.

Me: See? Just shampooing you and rinsing you alllll nice and calm.

Ivy: I…wait…. I CANNOT ACCEPT WATER IN MY FACE. MUST SHAKE NOW!!

Me: Oh for cryi— STOP THAT!!!!

Ivy: Ok, that feels bette–no, wait… MUST SHAKE AGAIN!!!

Me: STOP IT! I AM SODDEN, YOU STINKER!!!

Ivy: Ok, that’s fine. You may continue.

Me: You are so damn lucky I don’t dump this water on your head.

Ivy: You are so foolish, human. Do my bidding and finish drying me.

Me: (takes blow drier out) Ok, stay.

Ivy: OMG OMG OMG THE DRIER!! SQUEEEEE!!!

Me: Stop moving, you crazy mutt!

Ivy: (preening) Now this side, now over here, and don’t forget my tail.

Me: My lord, but you smell even worse wet.

Ivy: HURRY UP!!!

Me: Ok, done. Go to the living room.

Ivy: Are you nuts? I have to go outside so I can roll around and get this smell off of me.

Me: Not happening.

Ivy: CRUEL HUMAN!!! OPEN THIS DOOR SO I MAY GO OUT AND COME IN AGAIN.

Me: (grabs comb again)

Ivy: Hm….you know, the carpet looks comfortable. I think I will go lay on it.

Me: And I get to do this with Lenny tomorrow *sobs*

Yes, my life is awesome ๐Ÿ™‚


Why Siths Should Never Watch Home Improvement Shows

It took me a long time to realize it, but it’s true. Siths should never, ever watch home improvement shows.It is hard for me to accept, but there it is.

I am not a fan of what people call “reality shows”. Seems like a fishbowl of drama and frankly, not real at all. That’s why I began to watch home improvement shows. People had the same problems I do: leaky roofs, bad insulation, Formicaโ„ข. You watch to learn what wonderful improvements you can do to your home to update it and make it look Imperial. Who DOESN’T want a lightsaber sconce in their bedroom?? Or a Death Star light fixture??

Yes, I am making one of those. No, it’s not for me.

But then slowly it begins to seep in. You begin to realize that a lot of those so-called updates are for show and not for function. Anyone who knows me from the internet knows I am a big fan of bubble baths. You run hot water, add some scented bubble concoction, and sit back with a book and a glass of wine, or with the op-eds and a bottle of beer. Your own personal haven far from the madding crowd. Lately the trend in bath updates have been rather eye-catching: big stand-alone soaker tubs, rainfall showers with wall jets, bowl sinks, etc. And at first the Sith in you SQUEEEEs and wants it all like Alderaan burning. But the more you look at it, the more you start to see how impractical, how rebellious it is. Those stand-alone tubs hold almost no heat. The rainshowers feel like you are being waterboarded. The jets assault your sensitive areas when you least expect it. And those bowl sinks? Just try keeping them rebel scum free. The Force can only do so much and this is why Siths must be practical. Carrara marble? Nope, try quartz or stick with the passรฉ granite. Better yet, go with cement countertops and steel-topped kitchen islands. Bowl sinks? Nope, try the old fashioned undermount for seamless and little grout care, or get the trough type that you can hose down (with little Siths, this is a necessity). Rainshowers? Stick to what works and has adjustable settings.

In short, after my blather above, Siths must not only be practical, they must also adhere to the aesthetics of the Empire. This is my mantra as I sit down to watch someone’s bath being crashed. The last thing I need to do is spend extra time handwashing marble tiles and shining chrome.

Though the coffeebar and wine fridge in the bath sound awfully Sithy. ๐Ÿ˜‰


It’s Sunday, and I Should Be Cleaning but I Just Found Some Spray Paint and It Needs to Be Used

There has been a lot of upheaval in the house in the past two weeks. Consequently I have found lots and lots of paperwork that is A) worthless, 2) expired, and/or iii) in need of shredding. And y’all know what that means, right? It means I get to ignore it for a few days until I can come up with a plan that does not involve a lightsaber or conflagration. The HOA frowns on both. Until then, I need to start cleaning and reorganizing so I can rearrange furniture and free up space in the garage.

Some people keep their dining set in their garage, right?

Anyway, as I was cleaning up craft stuff in the garage, I came across a can of gold spray paint. Originally I had bought it to paint some wine bottles and decorate them in a country glam style for Christmas. And then I remembered my future SIL redid her guest bedroom and just needs some gold glam in it, so I’ll be using it on something today. Because a can of paint is a great reason to not do the bathrooms today, don’t you know.

So today I plan on writing (check), cleaning (a bit), shopping (for food), cooking, (for two), and painting (for fun). School starts tomorrow for Little One, so it’s important that I have a flexible schedule today in case she needs me during an absolute meltdown. And in case she needs to go through several wardrobe changes in preparation for the all-important First Dayโ„ข.

*first meltdown has occurred*

Now that that’s over, we can continue to have a normal day.

Ish. ๐Ÿ˜€