ENGLISH!! DO YOU SPEAK IT??

No, I’m not going to quote Samuel L. Jackson in its entirety here. I admit to having a jones when it comes to the English language. I came here not speaking a word of it, and worked hard to learn it. So sometimes I get a bit… frustrated when the kids get sloppy.

Last night at dinner we were discussing family stuff when the subject of my BIL came up. For some reason, Eldest was confused about his role in the Army, and Little One decided to set her straight:

Little One: He just came back from a deployisation!

Me: Deployment!

Little One: That’s what I meant.

Trust me, if it were once in a while it wouldn’t be a big deal. But each kid had an Engrish moment yesterday. It was like the stars colluded with Fate and threw a touchdown homerun. Between using slang and this, I don’t think my ears stand a chance.

Word to Your Mother!

Saturday I took the kids to IHOP, since I was in no mood to cook after an eight hour drive. As usual, there must be music, and Eldest was scrolling through the XM stations when I screeched at her to stop.

Moon Unit Zappa’s Valley Girl was on!!

Like oh my god!

Like, totally!

It’s like so bitchen!

Grody to the max!

Gag me with a spoon!

Like, fer sure….

Totally!

The kids listened to it with deer-caught-in-the-headlights looks and Eldest asked me, “Like, how old is this song?”

And smartipants that I am, I said, “Like, totally thirty years old!”

Sometimes I get the feeling the current generation thinks they invented the words like and totally. They looked surprised to learn that certain idioms they use have been around for decades. Some, like swag, are new to me. That one still confuses me, and drives Son up the wall whenever he hears it. Lately I have seen the terms beast and boss being used. I always thought a beast was a bad thing, or an X-Men character. How little I know, right?

But all that got me to thinking…. what is to stop me from being an etymological trendsetter?? So, I thought about it, and have come up with the coolest phrase evah!!

EPIC ENTROPY!!

I tried it on the kids this morning, and got a blank look for my efforts. But not to worry. It will catch on. Momma always has the last word, and that’s epic entropy 😉

I Bleed Maroon!!

GIG ‘EM, AGGIES!! WHOOP!!

And end to an era, but a new beginning!!

BEAT THE HELL OUTTA t.u.!! 😀

Tropical Treasure

One of my favorite little critters is the coquí, the national symbol of Puerto Rico. It is one of the cutest tree frogs, or hylas, in the world. They aren’t poisonous, but are very abundant, and because they are so small, they are everywhere.

Their song is a beautiful lullaby after a rain, and at night. It is said that a coquí will not sing outside of Puerto Rico, so here is a taste of nighttime in my tropical home:

Now, what I call a lullaby, others call a cacophony. My brother went to PR to visit for a week, hanging out with my dad. And this was our conversation via text:

Bro: (sends pic of coquí in can)

Me: How adorable!

Bro: No, how effin noisy.

Me: HAHAHAHA!!!

Bro: I feel accomplished for catching two in one night. Dad told me I achieved Hubby status.

Me: (laughs even harder)

Me: (catching my breath) Are they still yapping?

Bro: No, I threw them into the empty lot next door.

Me: (laughs hard enough to choke)

Bro: People that don’t know Puerto Ricans think that they yell because they are mad… but I think it’s just because sustained time on this island is cause for auditory damage.

I suppose it’s all relative. 😉

Musical Crush

Ok, y’all know Country music isn’t my kryptonite. But sometimes there’s a song that melts the heart. This is one, sung by my latest crush, Ryan Laird:

SWOON!!!! 😉

Networking Fail

Sometimes it’s fun to be on a social network. You get to see what your friends are up to, and catch up on current events, and best of all, keep track of your kids and their friends. The worst part about it is the ads. Sure, I understand that’s an income generator for the network, but sometimes their ad placement leaves me wondering. This is what came up, after I had clicked on a link on YouTube:

Uh, excuse me?? Credit card application and boudoir photography? And for those of you wondering, the video was Still Alive from the “Portal” videogame. I still can’t get that earworm out of my head. And what Portal and the cake being delicious and moist has to do with boudoir photography and American Express, I still don’t know.

Unless it’s a lie 😉

Arrrgh!!!

Aye, it’s Talk Like a Pirate Day, me mateys!! Time for a bit of the grog, and shiver your timbers with a song!!

As it is a Monday, try not to get yerself in trouble and avoid walking the gangplank!!

Ahoy, me harties, yo ho!!!

Canada Luv!

This morning I received a message from a friend, telling me of a young man from Canada who is coming to visit his family while he launches his American country music career. His name is Ryan Laird, which is just awesome in and of itself, he’s very talented, and hope y’all enjoy this song!

And his single, which is to die for:

Not bad, eh?

And back off, Taylor. I saw him first 😉