What a Crock

This is just not happening. NOT. HAPPENING!!

It is freezing today by Texas standards, which means hot comfort food is a must. I don’t get the chance to make beef stew often, but today was the perfect day for it. Sleety, windy, gray, cold: just like winter should be. Not what I want in a winter, but nothing I can do about that except maybe place The Goron on my Voodoo List™.

Not saying I did, mind you.

Anyway, I go to do my kitchen prep: peel and dice potatoes, carrots, onions, brown stew beef cuts, and open the red wine. Yes, I cook with wine. Sometimes I even put it in the food. I place all that heavenly goodness into the crock pot, plug it in and….. nothing.

NOTHING!!!

I am aghast. My crock pot is dead, y’all!!

I am at a loss. I love my crock pot. I use it at least once a week. After hyperventilating and walking around the kitchen island sobbing, I calmed down and decided to put it in the oven to cook, like a boss. Actually, like a boss that has a ton of cast iron dutch ovens. I’ll be danged if I let this setback ruin dinner. I mean, there is no way I am going out in this weather. Not even for a dinner out.

On the upside, Hubby has an idea of what to get me for Valentine’s Day 😉

Musings on Being Nostalgic

There are so many things I miss.

I never seem to give them any thought, though. Sometimes one or two things will quietly slip into my mind and remind me of good times long past. It may sound maudlin, but I am sure I’m not the only one that has a thought spring up like that.

I miss running after the ice cream truck. It was a challenge to see who could get to it first. Saving nickels and dimes every week just so you could get a Drumstick™ was fun, but eating it all before it melted into a sticky mess was an achievement.

I miss being able to slam down a phone. There was a satisfaction of hearing that BAM!! and knowing you had really made your *ahem* dissatisfaction known to the person on the other end.

I miss the card catalog. I loved, LOVED running my fingers down the index cards, reading the books’ information, pretending to be a detective trying to figure out the cryptic synopsis. It’s not as fun to look it up on the computer and have the whole plot outlined already.

I miss roller skates. Not roller blades, mind you. But the metal, scrappy, key-to-adjust kind that you put over your sneakers. That screech the wheels made as you tried to glide gracefully on the sidewalk was like music to my ears.

I miss Polaroids™. It was fun to wait for the film to develop right before your eyes, and yes, I shook the heck out of them. Before Photoshop™, before Instagram™, all you had to do was wait a few years and the film would antique itself quite nicely.

Anyway, I have been sentimental long enough. Time for me to take advantage of current technology and do some laundry in my high efficiency washing machine 🙂

Snowday, Texas Style

Today we are enjoying a snowday, that rarest of holidays here in South Texas.

By “snowday”, I mean there is ice on the ground and the vehicles are iced shut. And by “enjoying”, I mean the kids are testing my patience.

Snowdays down here are nothing compared to what Michiganders endure. I am sure they are laughing at us down here for shutting down schools and businesses, but the reality is we are not savvy drivers on icy roads. Heck, rain freaks us out. So better safe at home than sorry wrapped around a light pole.

Of course, Michiganders would probably melt down here in the spring, so we have that going for us.

But I am ready for Winter to go away.

Soooooooo done with winter. I want to feel the sun as it turns the asphalt into a mushy mess. I want to see flowers bloom in the adversity that is a Texas summer. I want to see water boil off the sidewalk. I’m getting nostalgic just thinking about it. If we humans could hibernate, I wouldn’t have such an issue with the cold. Or with shaving my legs.

Anyway, I hope that wherever you are, you are keeping warm and safe, and stabbing winter in the head 😉

Thursday Never List

I still remember the excitement of going to visit my cousins when I was younger. Usually going to San Juan meant an overnight trip, so my mom got to pack the bags and make sure we had everything we could possibly need without taking the kitchen sink.

Although there was this one time we did have to take the kitchen sink, because my uncle was going to use it in his work shed. But that’s another story.

You may think that packing a bag or a suitcase requires no skill, but you would be wrong. You aren’t using Mary Poppins’ carpetbag, which means you have a finite amount of space to use so you have to pack accordingly. However, there are some things one should never do without when doing an overnighter.

Never Leave Home Without It

#5– Toiletries

Specifically, toothpaste, shampoo, and deodorant. You can do without everything else, but these are non-negotiable.

#4– Extra socks

No one likes sweaty feet.

#3– Pain medication

Better safe than tripping on someone else’s meds.

#2– Sweater or light jacket

I don’t know of anyone that has been able to predict the weather correctly. Ever.

#1– Reading material

Just because you are visiting someone, doesn’t mean you have to be a Chatty Cathy. And nothing works as a shield better than reading some deep literature, like Zen, and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance. Tried and true.

And with that, I’m off to get medicated against the pollen count, put on an extra pair of socks so my toes don’t break off from frostbite, and hope to Hades I don’t need to clean the mouse cage. Have a good one! 🙂

Shredded

That’s how I feel.

Apparently we are in a record-breaking season for pollen. And this year is when my body decided I have allergies to pollen.

Yay….me….

This wouldn’t be so bad if they were Midichlorians.

Anyway, I figured y’all could enjoy an obscure Sithy.

That is so full of win, I can’t contain myself.

Ok, time for more medication. And by “medication”, I mean coffee. Hope y’all enjoy your day 🙂

Thursday Never List

As y’all know from yesterday, my mom is coming for a visit and I am in full panic mode. And by that I mean I am obviously sitting at my laptop wasting precious time.

If you wait until the last minute, it only takes a minute, right? RIGHT??

It doesn’t matter how often I tell myself, “Aggie, why not do this, or that, and get it out of the way before X comes over?” Usually when I do ask myself that, my other self retorts with, “HELLO?? Drama isn’t going to read itself, you know!” It’s a vicious cycle. At least it’s not viscous. That’s a whole other level my other other self would love to dissect.

I love my selfs. Heh!

Anyway, when it comes to cleaning, there are some things one should never skip. I mean it. Some things you can’t just ignore. It’s like giving Godzilla a key to Tokyo and a coupon for all-you-can-eat. Maybe that doesn’t make sense to y’all, but it sounded pretty awesome in my head.

Cleaning Jobs One Should Never Skip

#5– Refrigerator bins

Ignore it, and next thing you know the tomatoes are conspiring with the lemons to kill the lettuce and take over the fridge.

#4– Garbage disposer

Disposal… disposer… poh-tay-toh… poh-tah-toh. No matter what you call it, that little contraption hides all sorts of gunk and can really stink up the house.

#3– Towels

Any towel used for the express purpose of drying, be it a body or a dish, will start to smell of stagnant pond water.

#2– Stove pans

You know how you start cooking and suddenly the delish dish smells of dead rodent? Yeah, that’s why.

#1- Commode

Y’all should know this would be #1. If you didn’t then you have issues, and should call Molly Maid™ ASAP.

And those are my tips for today. Remember, the floor can be crunchy or sticky, as long as A) it’s not from bones or blood, 2) people wear shoes, and iii) Legos are safely stored away.

Those suckers can pierce leather 😉

Mamma Mia

My mom is coming for a visit this weekend. And y’all know what that means.

WHERE ARE THOSE FOREST CREATURES WHEN I NEED THEM???

(I started writing this this morning and then a friend came by for a visit, so I took time to bend her ear as far back as Canada. We now resume the post. Don’t complain about your free entertainment.)

Anyway, I have made a list of the stuff I wish to accomplish before she gets here. Keep in mind this list does not include mundane chores like scrubbing bathrooms or cleaning out the fridge.

• Paint small chest of drawers in silver.
• Reorganize the Christmas decorations.
• Clean out the bathroom cabinets.
• Finish hanging my artwork, so-called.
• Put away “excess” wine glasses. Notice the quotation marks.
• Get car registered.
• Hide all my Legos.

She’s actually very cool about my housekeeping, so-called. Which is nice, because if she wants to clean or fix something, she just does it while cooking. Did I mention cooking? Yes…yes, I did. And you know what’s great about it? The fact that I can gorge on her fabulous cooking and not care because she is coming waaaaaay before Lent. I’m so lucky I have sweat pants and loose shirts.

That’s how I measure happiness 😀

That Last Nerve

I try to be easy going and patient. Some people say I am the most patient person they know. That doesn’t mean I’m a saint. That just means I drive other people insane in a more subtle manner. It’s a gift, not a curse. Anyway, there are some things out there in the intertubewebnets that do try my patience, sometimes to the point where I am screaming to myself.

The fox doesn’t say any of those things.

Quit hoping to find Prince Charming. Start hoping you find those animals that really like housekeeping.

Yes, everything happens for a reason. Just remember that sometimes the reason is stupidity.

The five second rule for food is a myth. Especially if you have a two second dog.

Always try to be Harry Potter awesome, not Twilight awesome.

And with that, I hope y’all have a great Monday. As for me, I’m off to go clean house.

Apparently the forest creatures are either on strike or on vacation 😀

Thursday Never List

Some days ago, I was cooking dinner and manage to catch Little One in a mood to help. It doesn’t happen often, so when it does I take full advantage of it and basically turn her in the Sous Chef. The irony here is that she is my picky eater, and wasn’t going to eat dinner that night. Of course, that didn’t stop me from putting her to work. Anyway, I asked her to get the dill, and she brought me two jars.

LO: Here you go, Mom.

Me: We have two jars of dill? Both open??

LO: No, we have four.

Me: So why bring out two?

LO: One for each hand?

Me: *rolls eyes*

Apparently, we are fans of dill around here. And it got me to thinking about what else I have in my spice hoard. And what spices I just can’t do without.

#5– Pepper

All kinds. Except Jolokia. No joke.

#4– Oregano

I love it for most ethnic dishes, especially Puerto Rican ones.

#3– Thyme

The best part, aside the flavor, is hearing the mispronunciation.

#2– Paprika

Sweet or sharp, but especially sweet.

#1– Rosemary

Alone or in Herbs de Provence, the fragrance and flavor are sublime.

So there you have it: spices I can NOT do without. You may wonder why dill isn’t listed. Well, that’s because Eldest is responsible for that particular hoard. I’m only responsible for the jars, packets, and tins of Herbs de Provence and paprika.

All ten of them 😀

I Need a Tauntaun

Wholly carp is it cold out.

I wasn’t going to write about the weather, because everyone is writing or talking about it. I mean, it’s obviously THERE to discuss, right? Still, it sure put a crimp on the week. I’m just glad it wasn’t bad enough to close the schools. I don’t think we could have handled that very well. Scratch that. I know we wouldn’t have.

I would settle for lukewarm right now. I would also settle for Mark Hamill, but that’s not for a family-friendly blog. Anyway, this cold weather means I get to bake a lot, because using the oven is a great way to suffuse the living area with heat. Also, cookies and cake FTW!! (I would make a pie, but the apples all got eaten). So think of tropical islands and jalapeños to keep warm.

It could be worse. You could be in Canada 😉