Monthly Archives: September 2013

10,000th Comment!!!

I can’t believe this itty bitty blog has had 10,000 approved comments. Obviously I don’t include spam in that number. If I did, it would be a lot higher. Stupid bots. Anyway, I want to express my thanks to all who take the time to comment here. I know it doesn’t take long to do so most of the time, but your time is precious to you and it means a lot that y’all share it with me.

And the honor goes to:

OGRRRE!!!

With the winning comment:

Ms. Sith, you are a sick, sick individual. I like that.

There is much truth in that statement.

So once again, thank you all for indulging me in this past time 😀


Get On My Lawn!!

Some of y’all may know, I love flamingos. Every trip to the zoo begins with me taking a photo by my pink feathered friends. I must have dozens of photos, and all of them show my gradual deterioration maturity. Who knew Photoshop™ was relatively new?

flamingos

Sad to say, I don’t have any flamingo lawn ornaments. My HOA frowns on kitsch, even though a guy down the street has a veritable concrete menagerie in his front lawn. But I guess concrete deer are more realistic around these parts than a flock of flamingos. Anyway, while perusing the social-site-with-faces, a friend posted the most awesome thing since Big Mouth Billy Bass:

ZOMBIE FLAMINGO

zombie flamingos

Behold the epicness!!

You can not imagine the SQUEES OF GLEE that emanated from me yesterday. Actually, they sounded more like something from a horror movie, but that’s more fitting anyway. There are several different styles, including this one, but I liked the ones above found here. Why? Because they have TEETH, which makes them even more ridiculous. And we always go for the ridiculous here.

This year I am definitely decorating my yard for Halloween. But I’m thinking these babies will be year-round 😉


Thursday Never List

Last night I had the strangest dream. No, I didn’t sail a boat to China. I was dreaming of being in a flower field. Not wildflowers with insects and weeds and all of Nature screaming to get lucky. It was just flowers, no stems or leaves or grass at all. Just a field full of flower heads as far as I could….. I don’t know if “see” is the right word here. Detect? Sense? Whatever. It was just a bunch of flowers of every color, size, scent, and texture imaginable. Honestly, it felt like I was in a Monet painting, only not such a big mess, or so pastel-ly.

rafflesia-arnoldii

Anyway, that got me to thinking about flowers I never could get around to appreciating. There are some like the Rafflesia above, that would turn your stomach or are just plain ugly. But I am talking about the normal, everyday commercially available flowers. I suppose my dislikes are based more on mental blocks than anything else, but nevertheless I have them.

#5– Cannas

Sorry, to me they just look like the stem threw up the flower.

#4– Coreopsis Cone Flower

The petals look so wilted, they make me sad.

#3– Sunflower

Every time I see one, I am reminded of that creepy baby in Teletubbies™.

#2– Passion Flower

Honestly, it looks to me like threads unravelling and makes me itch to sew it back together.

#1– Dahlia

As pretty and sunburst-like and colorful, I just can’t get past the old Language of Flowers my grandmother taught me when I was five. It was considered the Death Flower. BIG block there for me.

So there you have my Thursday list. File it away for future reference 😉

UPDATE!!!

Hubby pointed out it isn’t Coreopsis but the Cone Flower that I think is sad. “I am good for something”, he said. I agreed 😀


Ulta-matum

Last Thursday evening, my daughters finally had time on their hands to allow their mother to take them to a beauty store, Ulta Beauty™. Little One is now turning 14, and wanted to get some make-up. I figured we would go in, get her the stuff and come out in 30 minutes.

Boy, was I wrong.

ulta-beauty

We walk in, and immediately feel the familiar disorientation. So I do what any normal mom would do: walk around aimlessly until something familiar comes into view. YAY!! LIPSTICK!!! Not only do they have almost every brand of make-up known to Womankind, they had sections for every type of make-up as well. But I was there for my kid, not me. Fine….FINE!! We go in search of the Bare Escentuals™ line, since she prefers the expensive stuff mineral make-up, and find her a kit that she likes (she is my picky child). And slyly she adds, “Mom, it doesn’t come with lip gloss…” Well, what kind of a mom would I be if I didn’t get her lip gloss? A SMART ONE!!! But she had Eldest on her side on this and I was weakened by my want need of new lip colors, so I relented. And thank goodness that Ulta™ had their lip, eye and nail colors on sale for 50% off, because that meant that I could get some lipsticks by Lipstick Queen™, which I am not ashamed to say I have been coveting for about five years now.

I understand this is not about me, but work with me here.

We saunter over to the haircare section to get some hairclips, and spy the sale bins. This place is not for the weak-minded. They had nail colors and eye quads and since they were reasonably priced I piled some in the bag decided to get some for the girls so they could experiment with them. Rounding the next corner we see the facial washes and treatments and both girls pipe up that they are out of their stuff. It was almost synchronized. But you must have a clean canvas in order to paint a masterpiece, right? Sigh…

By now what started as just four “need” items has grown to far, far more. Besides the kit, there are mascaras, eyeliner, seven bottles of nail polish, lip glosses, lipsticks, facial washes, hairclips, hair treatments, and numerous eye shadow quads. In a haze, I tell the girls that this is enough for now, because Ulta isn’t going away any time soon. So I go up to the cashier, a lovely young lady who asks me if I wish to sign up for their rewards card. My first instinct is to say no, since I seldom do that anywhere. But then I take stock of everything on the counter and tell her yes, please. With an understanding glance, she signs me up, rings up my purchases and gives me a few unexpected discounts, and tells me to enjoy my evening. I carry their behemoth-sized bag out to the car while the girls chatter along happily. Inwardly I am cringing at the bill, but the girls are happy and bonding together, something that seldom happens. And that makes up for it, no pun intended.

And that was my experience at Ulta™. Suffice it to say, Hubby took it in stride, not even batting an eye. It helped that I threw my kid under the bus told him that Little One needed a lot of new stuff. Hey, if I am going down for this, I’m taking them with me. They are enablers of the highest caliber 😉


Thursday Never List

Yesterday I wrote about having a distinct lack of motivation to get stuff finished around here. I did manage to finish a couple of projects after I unplugged myself from the interwebs wrote that post. A smartipants suggested I make a list of projects I’ll never finish. Depending on how the weekend goes, that may be next week’s list.

When I was perusing for a motivational funny, I found quite a bit that were sports and exercise oriented. Seriously, the only motivation I would ever need to exercise would be a clown in a hockey mask. But I do understand what motivates people to work hard to win at a sport. There are some sports however, that I will never understand.

chicken soccer

#5– Cross Country Running

Like I said, clowns with hockey masks.

#4– Sumo Wrestling

Uh…. this needs no commentary.

#3– Curling

I am sure to catch Hades for this, and I get there is a method, but it looks to me like you are ironing the ice.

#2– Jai Alai

I can barely make sense of lacrosse. Adding a wall and lines just serves to up the confusion ante.

#1– Wife Carrying

And I can just imagine what transpires if he drops her, seeing as he carries her on his back, upside down.

Don’t get me wrong. I do watch some of these. It’s like a train wreck in a way. And there are other sports that I would have included, too. But Chess Boxing just sounds too existential, even for this itty bitty blog 😀


Time for Motivation

Good Lawd. These past few days I have just lacked the will to finish random stuff around here.

I dusted everything, but the entertainment center.

I cleaned everything in the bathroom, but the shower stall.

I swept every floor, but the hallway to the garage.

I have several projects that are literally one step from being finished: a pumpkin needs a stem, a centerpiece needs a few leaves, apothecary lids need painting, books need mounting in frames, and so on. I know what needs to be done. I just don’t feel the want to finish it. I suppose this is a lethargy brought on by the emotional roller coaster ride in which we find ourselves for now. I know it will pass eventually, but it’s hard to not let it affect me every day, even in small ways.

motivation

So I’m going to get that fourth cup of coffee and finish five things today.

Don’t judge. Without that coffee I would be serving 25 to life somewhere. Probably 😉


Softly Call the Muster

To my brother Draco,

My heart grieves as it grips with your final goodbye. You were more than just a brother-in-law. You were a big brother, a buddy, and a friend. No matter what, you always knew you could come to me with anything, and often did. There were times when you made me pull my hair out in exasperation, but there were also times when you helped me in my troubles.

Just like a brother would.

I find myself listening to your voicemails, reading your texts and your messages. Hearing your voice again makes me smile, remembering the private jokes and the camaraderie we shared. This past year was not easy for you, but you made the best of it while you were here with us. We got to have you in our lives for eight months, and that in itself was a blessing from God. We still have the paracord bracelets you made, and the martini glasses you “acquired” for us, the beers you left behind, and the bottle of vodka you bought as a “thank you”. That bottle remains unopened on the shelf, waiting for the day when we can gather to celebrate you, Rottie style.

draco2

Yes the heart grieves, but it also remembers, and that will be the balm to comfort us. Rangers do lead the way, and you have never failed to do so. You lived more in your 48 years than most people do in two lifetimes. I pray you are at peace, and hope that in slipping the surly bonds that tethered you, you are now free. God bless and keep you, hermano. I am still, and know that you are with us.


Thursday Never List

When it comes to fashion, I am a creature of habit. I still own sweatpants I wore in college and shirts I wore in high school. As a teen in the 80’s, parachute pants and sleeveless shirts were big fads that in my frank opinion, should never have come to pass.

And don’t get me started on the prairie blouses.

parachute pants

There are some trends and fads that I will never follow. It’s not that they are bad, per se. It’s just that they seem like they are made to scream attention to the wearer. And so here is my list of fads I will never follow.

#5– Odd Nail Colors

Sure it can be nice to paint your nails blue if you’re a Cowgirls fan. I just can’t do it. I am a firm believer in pinks and reds for your nails. It reminds people of blood on talons, and you just can’t go wrong with that.

#4– Dipped Hair

That is when half the hair length is colored differently than the other. I have no desire to look like a popsicle. Not even in summer.

#3– Exposed Bra Straps

Guys don’t have to worry about this, but frankly, it just looks tacky to show off your bra strap, even on a shirt designed to do so. Unless Playtex™ and Victoria’s Secret™ pay you to advertise for them, don’t do it.

#2– Animal Prints

You are not Catwoman, so don’t dress like a cheetah. Animal prints as an accent? Sure. As a head-to-toe look? Verbotten in my closet.

#1– Boob Belt

No, just no. A belt is for holding your pants up, or to emphasize your waist. Never, EVER, should you wear a belt below your pectoral attributes. It’s one thing to be short-waisted, and quite another to extend the line of your hips all the way up to your chest.

So there you have it: fashions I’ll never employ. Now excuse me, but I have to go dig up my leg warmers from the box in back of the closet. I am in need of kindling 😉


No Ordinary Day

No matter how hard some people try to make this a day of service, or a sale at a store, this is no ordinary day.

On September 11th, we always remember.

911

And eleven years after that, another attack which left four Americans murdered in Benghazi, Libya.

benghazi-blood-on-the-hands

“All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing.” —  Edmund Burke

Forgetting lets evil win. Never, ever forget, and make sure to never let those who would choose to dismiss it forget, either.


Sunday Sithy

I had an awful night, culminating in two hours of total sleep, so any writing I may do will be unintelligible. At least to most of you. Eh, it’s Sunday. Y’all don’t need to be reading existentialist stuff anyway. But with the troubles in the world today, I thought this Sithy was rather appropriate, courtesy of XBradTC.

darth recruit poster

I’m pretty sure he could do it alone. He just likes to have minions in case he needs a nap.

Hope y’all have a great Sunday 🙂