I have a confession to make: I have no idea how to use a sewing machine.
I can hear you gasping in shock all the way over here.
Before y’all condemn me, I know how to sew, but only by hand. And it’s not that I haven’t had the opportunity to learn on a machine. My mom sews, my sister sews, my daughter took it in what we used to call Home Economics before it went all politically correct. In retrospect, I should have taken Home Ec. It sure would have made my culinary path a bit easier, that’s for sure. I think the reason I never learned to use a sewing machine was fear: I was afraid of sewing my fingers, or making a huge mistake, or tangling all the bobbins, or having the machine come to life. I have an active imagination.
Lately though, I have been wanting to learn to use a sewing machine. Why? Because all of the tiny little projects I have been doing need some sewing, and my thumbs are about to go on strike.
Last night as I was making a cord cover for Eldest’s light fixture, I jammed the needle into the thumb cuticle. I bet that just made y’all flinch, didn’t it?? I know I sure did. I think that was my last straw. Perhaps getting a small, standard sewing machine isn’t a bad idea. Oh, nothing fancy that does embroidery or the dishes. Just something that will prevent me from inflicting multiple stab wounds on myself. I’ll make sure Santa Claus gets the memo. I know he’s always at a loss as to what to get me 😉
October 18th, 2012 at 9:42 AM
You need one that zig zags at least
October 18th, 2012 at 11:31 AM
No doubt about that! Thanks 🙂
October 18th, 2012 at 9:43 AM
You know, you can pick up a child’s machine with finger protection at Joann’s for $15-$25. 🙂 Good luck. If you want any hints, my sewing machine is right next door to my web cam.
October 18th, 2012 at 9:43 AM
Oh, and get something called a walking foot. It helps you sew over very thick sections.
October 18th, 2012 at 11:32 AM
*scribbles furiously*
I just hope Santa is paying attention 😉
October 18th, 2012 at 12:43 PM
When I was a kid, my Mom would let me play with her sewing machine. I’d make designs on wash clothes….until one day when I got my thumb a little too close to the needle. It hit my nail, bent and came out the side of my thumb. Once my hand stopped bouncing up and down, I couldn’t get it off. it was like a fish hook. I now avoid those infernal machines
October 18th, 2012 at 12:56 PM
Great….GREAT!!! Now I’m going to be afraid again 😛
October 18th, 2012 at 1:23 PM
Know a guy that did that with an industrial leather sewing machine. All the way through his thumb a couple of times before it bent. They had to cut it out. Yikes!
October 18th, 2012 at 1:27 PM
You know, these stories are NOT helping… 😉
October 18th, 2012 at 9:44 PM
Think happy thoughts…..strong Scandinavian Viking-types sporting kilts and wicked machetes, bearing loads of chocolate as they storm up the front walk on the backs of wild Wookees….
October 18th, 2012 at 9:46 PM
….although, in my own happy place, they’re redheaded Valkyries (female Vikings, for the uninformed) with green eyes, long spears, iron axes, and braided mustaches…
October 19th, 2012 at 8:36 AM
Make sure to include some lip wax in that dream of yours 😉
October 19th, 2012 at 3:03 PM
Lip wax…a stick of butter…handcuffs….two rubber chickens….a weedwhacker….extra TV remote….yeah, its all there.
October 19th, 2012 at 3:22 PM
Your wife’s a saint 😆
October 19th, 2012 at 8:12 PM
She does put up with a lot, yes. But I don’t get away with nearly as much as you might think. She’d never agree to TWO rubber chickens.
October 19th, 2012 at 10:16 PM
Well, there *are* limits 😀
October 18th, 2012 at 1:28 PM
Ok enough with the horror stories….ugh I am so picturing that pepelp2
October 18th, 2012 at 1:22 PM
Poor thing…x
October 18th, 2012 at 1:27 PM
The scotch made it feel tons better 😉
October 18th, 2012 at 1:46 PM
damn straight! xx
October 18th, 2012 at 1:27 PM
Ok no fair making me flinch first with what you did last night and then with So Cal Oil Man……ugh!!!
Anyway, both of my grandmothers and mother were excellent seamstress’ however neither my sister or I learned to sew from them. Grandmother’s said they didn’t have time and well my mother tried to teach my sister and after living through that hell forbid her from trying with me. So I never really did pick up the knack. Just thinking about it, my mother didn’t teach me cook either.
Good Luck Aggie, I did learn enough to use my graduation gift from my dad which was a sewing machine. Go figure.
October 18th, 2012 at 1:28 PM
HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
Karma at her finest, huh??
October 18th, 2012 at 1:30 PM
Aggie what was the best was when they came to visit and my mom needed to fix something and asked for the sewing machine. I had to dig through the closet to find it, my father said well guess that was a waste of money.