July 17, 2012

Five Colored Rings

By LC Aggie Sith

Yes, it’s almost time for the SUMMER OLYMPICS!!!!

I love the opening and closing of the Games, but not for the reasons you may think. For me, the opening ceremony is not about the pageantry of the athletes. It’s about who can make the tackiest show!! I can honestly say the Barcelona Games were the least tacky in my opinion. The most? Los Angeles, 1984. BAR NONE!! C’mon…. 84 Baby Grand pianos coming out of the walls of the stadium while playing George Gershwin’s Rhapsody in Blue will never be beat.

I do wonder what London has up its sleeve, though. Their choice of mascots, no matter the story that inspired them, gives me great pause. Perhaps it will surpass the ’84 ceremony. I know people aren’t too happy about what our athletes will be wearing,  the design of which will only add to the tackiness of the show, in my opinion.

In any case, I shall be glued to the TV watching and laughing at the spectacle. I’ll probably need a bathroom break when Wenlock and Mandeville make their appearance:

Seriously, London?? I mean, I understand the lion has been a mascot, but y’all still had the bulldog!!

The anticipation is killing me. I hope it’ll last 😉

About LC Aggie Sith

Machete-wielding zombie killer when not shopping for shoes. View all posts by LC Aggie Sith
This entry was posted on Tuesday, July 17th, 2012 at 11:19 AM and tagged with , , and posted in Armchair Tourist, Fun Stuff, Schports. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.

29 responses to “Five Colored Rings”

  • katiepede
    July 17th, 2012 at 11:49 AM

    I know that there’s going to be this random farm thing going on for the opening cermony??!…..

  • RabidAlien
    July 17th, 2012 at 3:07 PM

    Wow. And I thought Atlanta’s little space-guy (whatever the heck that was) was weird! Those things just look like they’re begging to be put out of their misery. Hmmmm…perhaps we should tell the Ewok from a post or two back that they’re actually new clone-troopers?

  • Nicole
    July 17th, 2012 at 6:24 PM

    Nicely quoted there at the end. 🙂

  • John D
    July 17th, 2012 at 7:59 PM

    “84 Baby Grand pianos coming out of the walls of the stadium while playing George Gershwin’s Rhapsody in Blue will never be beat.”

    I’m sure something featuring Lady Gaga could beat it. Nothing’s tackier than Lady Gaga.

    London’s mascots have one huge eye, symbolic of the plethora of surveillance cameras posted all over the city. Big Brother is watching you.

  • flujan
    July 18th, 2012 at 12:09 AM

    Yeah—yeah—yeha!!!

  • RoundHammer117
    July 18th, 2012 at 12:54 AM

    Had the Britons chosen the British Bulldog as their olympic mascot in place of those . . . things . . . the hajis – ever offended – would burn londonistan to the ground.

    Instead of the CHAVs this time.

    Same difference.

    And just WHO is representing the US? Metrosexual fugitives from a made in china yacht club for air france flight attendants?

    No?

    But that is what they dress like . . .

    Will never again watch anything on NBC – N[othing] B[ut] C[rap] – not since they had pundits repeatedly call American Soldiers and Marines bloodthirsty mercinaries and not fire them.

    But I take personal insults a might personal . . . crazy, right?

    I did jump out of perfectly good airplanes just to be surrounded when I hit the ground . . .

    • LC Aggie Sith
      July 18th, 2012 at 9:06 AM

      Metrosexual fugitives from a made in china yacht club for air france flight attendants

      That’s probably the most apt description evah!!

      • RoundHammer117
        July 18th, 2012 at 4:22 PM

        Duz this meanz I winz teh interwebz today, Ms.Aggie . . .?

        I got all the tubes hooked onto the bed of the pick up truck, even if al gore does not approve of what I am doing with his internet or the carbon footprint.

        I reminded him I have an extensive surplus of carbon credits, having taken them from the insurgents I had confirmed overseas . . .

        And realizing the jig was up, he cried.

        But I dried his tears – with an industrial hair dryer – and lifted his spirits – if only I had a trebuchet – and told him the Man-Bear-Pig would make a better olympic mascot.

        If not teh interwebz, can I haz cheezburgerz . . .?

        • LC Aggie Sith
          July 18th, 2012 at 5:47 PM

          Real cheeseburgers, with bacon if you’d like 😉

          • RoundHammer117
            July 18th, 2012 at 7:36 PM

            I will have the double super Chuck Norris / John Wayne / Clint Eastwood cheeseburger, please. Medium well, iceburg lettuce, tomato, pickles, red onions – diced – American cheese, Kaiser roll. No sauce.

            Super fries and a Coca-Cola, too. Heinz 57 – read: real – ketchup.

            I shall set about designing my trebuchet whilst enjoying such Americana righteous awesome goodness . . .

            The gorical is going to get some guilt-free frequent flyer miles.

            “Are you ‘thore thi’ss is muth’a ea’rth friendly . . .?”

            Yes I am . . .

          • LC Aggie Sith
            July 19th, 2012 at 8:51 AM

            KAISER roll??? 😉

          • RoundHammer117
            July 19th, 2012 at 2:06 PM

            Kaiser rolls do not fall apart like hamburger buns . . . they offer hearty texture and body to compliment your Americana goodness.

            Should you ever visit new york – emphasis on VISIT, then return to the free world, emphasis on TEXAS – go to the New York Burger Company . . . they are the home of Chuck Norris / John Wayne / Clint Eastwood burgers and taste like freedom.

            New York used to be free, you know . . . yes, I would laugh with you right now, Ms.Aggie . . . but I am stuck here.

            New York Burger Company
            303 Park Avenue South
            23d Street – eastside of Park Ave
            New York, NY 10010

  • B.C.
    July 19th, 2012 at 3:34 PM

    They look like Cycloptic walking sperms. Or, perhaps, they represent the mis-shapen teefusses that the British Isles are so renowned for having in abundance?

    I, too, am loathe to watch not only the Oh!-lympics, but anything broadcast on the New Boshevik Corporation. Unfortunately, the spousal unit and Teh Princess are going to be in Londonistan and other EUnuchistani cities during the first week of the games, so I will be forced to record ungodly sums of hours of Bob “Obama’s Taint-Licker” Costas spewing his self-important bullshit and those insufferable, mind-numbing “human interest” stories about how 95% of the athletes overcame being born with no hands, no feet, spinal curvature, malaria, denge fever and the heartbreak of gingivitis, only to pull victory from the jaws of defeat after being inspired to greatness by the election of Teh Won.

    • LC Aggie Sith
      July 20th, 2012 at 9:00 AM

      This is why there’s a mute button 😉

      Yeah, it ticks me off to watch anything on that network, but in this case, I will drink a beer before the festivities to make it more palatable.

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