As God is my witness, I am not making this up.
Yesterday, the window on my van was repaired. That required the presence of a “stranger” in my driveway. My neighbor’s dog, an awesome, well-trained Australian Shepherd, was consequently driven nuts by the fact that someone he doesn’t know was in such close proximity to the area he is tasked to guard. I could hear him barking even while I was inside my house. Anyway, my neighbor was also dogsitting for her parents’ Aussie, a much younger, active, less-trained puppy. This puppy has the gift of egging other dogs on about barking and chasing and doing the things dogs normally do, only at a few orders of magnitude. In other words, the puppy is usually the instigator.
After the repairman left, I moved the van into the garage, and then proceeded to go move the Pathfinder to the driveway, since I had parked it on the street. My neighbor, blessed woman that she is, was out with both dogs letting them relieve themselves. Her dog wasn’t on a leash, because he is trained to stay on the lawn. Before I go any further, I must underline how much I like this dog. As I walked down my driveway, perilously close to my neighbor’s yard, the dog, still in protective mode, charges at me. As taught, I stand my ground, and as HE was taught, he charges again.
My neighbor is screaming at her dog while frantically holding on to the instigator puppy.
On the second charge, the dog finds something to nip at. Now, my arms were at my sides, and I was standing sideways to him by this time. The only thing he can detect, small as it is, is my *ahem* upper pectoral milk decanting device. As I said, he is well-trained, so he only nipped at it.
But holy cow that was more than enough!!!
In tears, I get in the Pathfinder and move it, while my neighbor is calming and reinforcing training on her dog. I get out to let her know I’m fine, and hilarity ensues.
Neighbor: ARE YOU OK????
Me: Yes, it hurt a bit but..
Neighbor: OMIGAWD!! Did (name redacted to protect the innocent) bite you???
Me: Just a nip, nothing serious, really. (I am trying to calm her down by now)
Neighbor: Where??
Me: Uh…. (pointing).
Neighbor: OMIGAWD!!! Did he break skin???
(Keep in mind if a dog does draw blood, it must be quarantined for 72 hours, and the person treated for it)
Me: Oh no… not at all. I’m fine.
Neighbor: Are you sure? Take a picture of it and send it to me.
Me: (Laughing) No offense, but that is something I would only do for Hubby!!
Luckily, I am married to a doctor who took it upon himself to *ahem* check it over to make sure it was ok. Yes, it’s a bit tender, but it will heal. Suffice it to say, the dog was very contrite, and did snuggle up to me to make up for it. He sure is an awesome dog, but apparently takes that whole “take a bite out of crime” thing to extremes π
May 22nd, 2012 at 8:26 AM
Ouch! Those Aussies are high strung, aren’t they?
May 22nd, 2012 at 8:40 AM
I think this one is just protective. He did try to lick me to death, he was so sorry π
May 22nd, 2012 at 8:39 AM
It is a good thing you speak ‘dawg’, else this fella would be in the pokey! Glad all is going to be good.
May 22nd, 2012 at 9:13 AM
geez aggs, if i had done that you would have kilt me daid <(S)
glad your "Decanter" is ok tho
May 22nd, 2012 at 9:20 AM
Ouch. There will be quite a bruise, I’m sure..and so glad it wasn’t a broken skin “nip”. I do have to laugh at you / with you? often, in fact. I’m sure you realize that you used the phrase “holy cow” right after revealing the part of your body that had been nipped? I know you meant to do that, and it makes me love you even more! π funny, funny girl!
May 22nd, 2012 at 9:30 AM
I do love being punny π
May 22nd, 2012 at 10:22 AM
It’s not often one can ask one’s doctor to “Kiss it and make it feel better.” π
May 22nd, 2012 at 10:30 AM
HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
Just FYI, I didn’t ask.
May 22nd, 2012 at 1:04 PM
B.C. beat me to it. LOL
May 22nd, 2012 at 1:43 PM
As an afterthought, did you put on a couple of “Toys”
pastiesbandages and walk around the bedroom for the attending physician and ask him “I’ve got two Woody’s on my chest— Wanna make it three?” π*Dives into machete-proof bunker*
May 22nd, 2012 at 1:51 PM
I swear, it’s a good thing you don’t live in Texas….
May 22nd, 2012 at 1:45 PM
Aggie?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NKzIJBCkJ2M
May 22nd, 2012 at 1:52 PM
HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
Thank goodness it wasn’t a beaver. The ensuing comments at that bit of imagery would not have been family-friendly π
May 22nd, 2012 at 5:10 PM
At least he didn’t try to Eat your arm like Skittles the wonder mutt did to me when I tried to keep her from beating up the pup a couple weeks back. Lesson learned, Never wade into a dog fight, especially between 2 female pit bulls :op
May 22nd, 2012 at 5:22 PM
OMG, Aggie –
(Wait a minute, I just fell out of my chair again….)
Glad you’re OK!
May 22nd, 2012 at 6:30 PM
Bringin’ up the rear (heh!) on this one.
Does that qualify me for the booby prize?
*snicker* *snort*
May 23rd, 2012 at 6:14 AM
Hah…hah…hah…. π
May 23rd, 2012 at 6:18 AM
βA Bit Nippyβ classic. A Boxer got “all up” on Stretch the other day, and I had to kick the shit out of it…and they’re related, I guess (German). What is this world coming to?
Anyway, Australian Shepherds are beautiful dogs. My good friend has one named Blue. Cool dog.
May 24th, 2012 at 2:48 PM
One of our dogs has a fetish for biting fingernails. Oddest thing ever. He will gnaw on my gf’s fingernails as long as she’ll put up with him. Yeah, he’s a special dog. π