When Songs Fail

I will confess: I am trapped in a timewarp when it comes to music. I grew up in the 80’s, so that should tell you some, and also in Puerto Rico, which should tell you more, and finally, my dad is really into Classical and Big Band, which completes the picture. But songs nowadays leave me puzzled, to say the least.

Yesterday I was picking up the kids from school when Maroon 5’s Moves Like Jagger came on. Usually, I tend to tune out wailing on the radio, but the kids seem to like it. Anyway, something told me to pay attention, that something being the name Jagger.

The only Jaggers I know are Mick, and his ex-wife, Bianca. And I only know of her because she designs lingerie.

The part that obviously caught my attention after that, was the chorus:

Take me by the tongue
And I’ll know you
Kiss me ’til you’re drunk
And I’ll show you

All the moves like Jagger
I’ve got the moves like Jagger
I’ve got the moves like Jagger

Really? REALLY??? Bad enough you want to take someone by the tongue, which can be painful if done literally, but to move like this??

THAT is what you wish to emulate when trying to woo a girl? Not Barishnikov? Not Astaire? Seriously, Mick Jagger?? Who writes this crap?

Now excuse me, but I suddenly feel the need to listen to Frank Sinatra.