No, I don’t even pretend to be Emily Post. I don’t even pretend to be the most well-mannered person. But there are some things that just get under my skin, and tend to make my blood boil out through my pores.
If you call me, call to talk to me, not to another person in the room, with whom you choose to get into an argument while I listen to the taudry details of whether or not you owned a particular brand of skillet. I do NOT care.
If you decide to drive on the left lane, please be aware that you are supposed to go a bit faster than the other people in the other lanes, because it is for passing. Don’t be a left lane vigilante and force the rest of humanity to go three miles under the speed limit out of the goodness of your heart. If I want a ticket, I will damn well earn it.
If the check-out line is for ten items or less, and you have 11 or 12 items, it’s no big deal to me. If you have a cartful of stuff, it becomes an issue. If you insist that you have a right to check out in that line because you are a taxpayer, or because you are in a hurry, it will cause a detonation of your milk jug all over your head.
While I am glad you wear boxers, I am NOT glad to see it. It is referred to as underwear for a reason. Unless you happen to be Heidi Klum or Jason Statham, pull your pants up and use a belt. You look like a convict.
If you are driving a vehicle that is capable of major damage, and even death, don’t use your freakin’ cellphone. Pull the hell over and answer it. And while you’re at it, put the damn thing away if you are eating at my table. I will toss the cellphone in the trash disposer if you insist on using it while eating dinner in my home.
Sigh…ok, I think I will stop for now. Too early for a beer.
But not too early for cookies 😀
October 6th, 2011 at 10:05 AM
Great rules of etiquette, and necessary.
In reference to phone etiquette, if I’m talking with someone on the phone, and they tell me “oh, I have another call, I’ll be back,” I always hang up on ’em. I figure if they really wanted to talk to me, they wouldn’t let someone else crash the conversation.
October 6th, 2011 at 10:11 AM
Beellllllllllllch. Excuuuuuuuuuuse me.
October 6th, 2011 at 10:26 AM
Yeah, I NEVER talk on my cell phone while driving. Besides that’s prime Angry Birds playing time right there.
October 6th, 2011 at 10:50 AM
I saw a guy get out of a car, and he literally had to pull his pants up from his thighs; I giggled.
He waited and opened the door to the building. I thought that was a sweet reminder for me -not to judge a book by its cover
October 8th, 2011 at 3:58 AM
you two “work” at the same prison?
October 6th, 2011 at 11:37 AM
Stab them all. Sonsabitches.
October 6th, 2011 at 2:05 PM
Sounds like you have suggestions for some rules! The Queen is taking notes!
October 6th, 2011 at 2:47 PM
Aggie, I saw this and thought of you. Enjoy!
October 6th, 2011 at 3:40 PM
LOLZ…
Left lane vigilantes (snort) drive me nuts! Literally. Sorry, I just had to go there. Lack of wits today being eclipsed by raging punniness. Unit poker party last night! 😛
October 6th, 2011 at 7:48 PM
Good rules. And it’s never, ever too early for cookies.
October 6th, 2011 at 9:00 PM
Amen. And can I have ice cream with my cookies?
October 6th, 2011 at 9:14 PM
ZOMG!! COOKIE ICE CREAM SANDWICHES FTW!!!!
October 7th, 2011 at 10:00 PM
Wrong! It’s NEVER to early for a beer!!
Watching the sunrise from a tropical beach, while washing down gallo pinto with a cold local brew; now that’s living…:)
October 8th, 2011 at 4:04 AM
i’m with you on the cell phone thing while eating…. i see it way too frequently. it drives me nuts.
October 9th, 2011 at 10:07 PM
@Aggie
Here’s another one that pisses me off. Four lane road…two stoplights on each lane, traffic both ways, and someone is in the left lane, turning left…and does not have their turn signal on. Pisses me off to no end. I know it’s a small thing, but it’s a good thing I don’t have rocket pods installed in my car. I would blow ’em the hell up. I do not like to sit through stop-lights. It’s the little things.
@The Curtal Friar
On the flip side…I only tell someone I have another call when I’m sick of talking to them and want to hang up. Usually happens when I’m drunk dialed by someone.